Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all,
I am married to a lovely man who is (non officially diagnosed) High Functioning autistic. This came about 3 to 4 years into our marriage when we attended counselling for problems we were hitting and although he will not go and get diagnosed he is acceptant. I learnt to understand and adapt , dare I say compromise my needs for his. However we have really hit a bad patch and I'm so worn out through the constant 'take' and no give. He's also suffering from ED (and won't go to the doctor - too embarrassed) which has had a massive impact on us too. He' behaviour is so childlike - sulky, stroppy, unhelpful ... but I know he thinks the world of me. I feel like I'm holding onto our relationship by a thread. I love him so much but its so stressful. I have asked for a kiss and a hug every morning and evening but you would have though I'd asked for moon! I suppose the next stage is counselling - any recommendations? He won't go back to RELATE as they were the ones who 'diagnoses' him in our counselling session which didn't help !
Willing to do anything but the strain and loneliness is really sad.
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I think there should be self help groups for wives in the uk. I am feeling pretty desperate myself.
There are some, my friend started one so they are there but they are probably started by individuals in that situation rather government programs or something. If you don’t want to start one and you don’t want an online group you might have to be prepared to travel a little because I don’t think they’re set up yet in every town/city/village or whatever, but I’m sure you’ll be able to find one. My friend said it’s a life saver for her and she’s made so many new friends, she loves it and wouldn’t know what to do without their support.