My son is being bullied

Hi 

My son is 9 and is being asset for autism my son has never had a lot of friend when he was younger and started nursey he had a speech problem which stoped being able to communicate with childern but it never seemed to bother him now as he's got older he's tried to make friends but he's always found it hard to make friends so he now has nobody to play with it has always broke my heart now he's in year 5 he gets teased and kids invited the whole class to party's and doesn't invited my baby boy.hes a lovely boy he's so kind so friendly he's not got a nasty bone in his body I don't understand how childern can be cruel it breaks my heart that my son does not have that one single friend he can talk to in school and if been into school and nothing seems to get done has anybody got any advice I don't want my son to ever feel lonely 

Kind regards 

A worried mummy

Parents
  • Hi there, maybe you can do something to help him being included outside of school? I did have friends in school at that age but not later really, and got bullied a lot, but one thing that made it bearable somehow was to know that I would see my friend in the afternoon, and at hindsight I'm actually grateful she didn't go to the same school as me (which would have been the more likely option really) because she may well also have been taught there that I'm not one to be friends with. The thing is, 9 or so is probably about the age when kids start to choose friends or simply who to play with not just based on who they like or don't but also whom the cool kids approve of. So being excluded doesn't necessarily mean that no other kid likes you, just that the cool ones have figured out that you aren't quite as cool. But outside school those things don't apply, it's much easier to have what would be seen as an unlikely friendship in school.

    Maybe you find something he really enjoys where he can meet other children outside school? If he's good at sports then that may be an obvious one, but if he isn't that's probably not the place to start with. But maybe some sort of regularly volunteering where kids can join (the local animal home for example or something of that sort), something non-competitive would probably make it easier, and where he can just be himself for the activity it is about, so he can be more relaxed than with things he constantly finds challenging.

Reply
  • Hi there, maybe you can do something to help him being included outside of school? I did have friends in school at that age but not later really, and got bullied a lot, but one thing that made it bearable somehow was to know that I would see my friend in the afternoon, and at hindsight I'm actually grateful she didn't go to the same school as me (which would have been the more likely option really) because she may well also have been taught there that I'm not one to be friends with. The thing is, 9 or so is probably about the age when kids start to choose friends or simply who to play with not just based on who they like or don't but also whom the cool kids approve of. So being excluded doesn't necessarily mean that no other kid likes you, just that the cool ones have figured out that you aren't quite as cool. But outside school those things don't apply, it's much easier to have what would be seen as an unlikely friendship in school.

    Maybe you find something he really enjoys where he can meet other children outside school? If he's good at sports then that may be an obvious one, but if he isn't that's probably not the place to start with. But maybe some sort of regularly volunteering where kids can join (the local animal home for example or something of that sort), something non-competitive would probably make it easier, and where he can just be himself for the activity it is about, so he can be more relaxed than with things he constantly finds challenging.

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