Published on 12, July, 2020
I currently employ a lovely young chap of 19. He is an apprentice and has been working with the company for about 4 months. What we originally believed were excentricities are now becoming more noticably signs of Asperger Syndrome. He shows pretty much most of the classic signs. We have asked him to tell us about his medical history but there has been no diagnosis. My staff find him quote difficult to deal with at times as he has ritualistic behaviour which can result in mild arguements, repetive physical behaviours which interfer with his work and many occassions where he has been unable to empathise. To be honest we do not know what to do. My partner and I are both ex teachers and have both had experiences of working with children who have asperger syndrom. He is quite typical of the children we have seen. We feel that if we knew that he had it then we could accomodate his behaviour better..at the moment he leaves us and our staff frustrated an confused by his actions. By knowing we would be able to adjust and accomodate. The main question is "what can we do to help him and thereby help us?" I need to know if he he has the syndrome (although I am pretty sure that he does) and what I can do to support him if anything...?
It seems to me that bigbossy has come here for help in working out how to deal with someone whose behaviour is causing real problems in the workplace. The ideal outcome is that the employer becomes enlightened and that their employee finds themself in an understanding and accomodating environment where he can thrive. The endgame should be win-win rather than the friction continuing or worse.
There are lots of ways that greater understanding can be obtained. That understanding can start with the employers reading all about it and making allowances. Ultimately this will work better if the employee is engaged in the process but it does not necessarily need a diagnosis. Having a label assigned is a big step to take and he may not want any more labels as he may not think that this is beneficial for him. As I suggested before, OH could be engaged to help the situation, I think you are probably able to send him to see an OH doctor who may be able to discuss the pros and cons of diagnosis with him. There is the possibility of a private diagnosis which circumvents the NHS 9-12 month delay. This could be a sound investment for your company to make.
He may well benefit from additional clarity. He may need to have a rule written down about sharing chocolates. Note that if you make it a rule about chocolate then he may not see that it applies to cakes or biscuits so you have to be more explicit than you might think. I agree with longman about trivial and irrelevant things but I can also see that an incessant tapping could get on people's nerves and create friction and drive everyone else up the wall.
I have been on both sides of this situation. I once managed a chap, who I suspected had ASD. As an undiagnosed Aspie at the time, I failed to understand and engage with him properly and the situation deteriorated and was very stressful on both sides. Ultimately we both cracked under the strain and we both left that company. In hindsight, a diagnosis may have saved both of our jobs and the collateral damage that we both suffered. An undiagnosed aspie managing another undiagnosed aspie is probably one of the worst employment situations imaginable as the lack of insight on both sides makes for a spectacularly terrible relationship.