Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm just writing to a well known food chain, advising them of some shortcomings I am experiencing with their home delivery process.
Post Pandemic, I've realised just how much I utterly hated going "shopping" and I realised we are really invested now in home delivery!
(So much, that I'm actually attempting to get the process to work a bit better)
I wondered if it's just me, or is this a more universal Autism thing?
For those of you who don't like to post or vote, this is a very simple question, and you can possibly excercise a bit of power if you have a strong feeling about shopping.
We constitute about 1/50th of the population if I have my facts correct, (I may not when it comes to that number) so IF we turn out to be "all of one mind" it's worth "niche influencers" like myself (I KNOW companies, and even lawmakers, can be influenced by a well written complaint, as I've been doing it for years! I claim credit for killing a Kellogs ad campaign in the nineties with a particularly vitriolic communication to the right department and the part of U.K. drone law that lets your kids (and me!) fly a toy in your own back garden...
Complaining is like planting seeds, and waiting to see which ones sprout. For those who are lacking in funds and powerless it's a very cheap hobby, too.
You just have to do it creatively, and not "whine"...
So how do YOU feel about a trip to the shops?
Wow! That's opened a can of worms for me! (I wonder if they'll start selling cans of worms when humans have exhausted all other food resources.....)
I can soooo relate to what everyone says on here! The tannoy is like someone shouting in your ear! The lights make everything have an "unreal" feel. The people chatting, smelling of strong strong perfumes. The cleaning isle shouting at me with it's processed smells just as I enter the store. I always need to prep myself before I go shopping and I can only go to one particular store because I know it.
I wrote to the management of a certain shopping centre explaining the needs of sensory sensitive folk and now I notice classical music above my head. The thing they failed to do was turn of the music in the individual shops and change the lighting. Okay, so I know this is never going to happen due to finances but I am certain the majority of us are Autistics but we are bloody good at masking to appear otherwise. Except I am emerging more and more myself as quite frankly, I don't give a f@@@ anymore. I'm done with trying to be how I perceive others want me to be:
Step one: Wear clothes that are comfortable and not what my mum wants me to wear to attract that elusive "soul mate." I'd rather be me and connect with someone who admires that not what a female "should" look like. I have my own unique style and I suit it.
Step two: Tell people of clubs I want to go to that I cry when I am overwhelmed and allow them to make a decision as to whether they can handle that and if they are understanding of it. I've found all are so far.
Step three: Do not apologise for crying. It's normal and uncomfortable enough for me without having another stick to beat myself with.
Step four: Stuff exposure therapy. Shops will always be horrible places because of my senses. Exposing myself to them will not reduce my sensitivity. I have tried and it doesn't work. Going at certain times when they don't move all the products (as folks have mentioned here) works best as routine is comforting and quick.
Step five: I am quirky. I am drawn to people who are non conventional. I am going to seek them out, befriend them and revel in my weirdness. F%%% society.
Can of worms firmly closed with lid tightly on and worms free to live another day however they damn well like. ;-)
That sounds like a good five step plan
With regards to step four I wholeheartedly agree that exposure therapy is never going to help when the issues are sensory in nature. I think that is why so many autistic people end up much worse when they seek help for anxiety. Repeated exposure actually heightens the sensitivity and the resultant emotional response.
Autonomistic,
Thanks for the compliment and validation. I think I'm going to stop all psychological therapies/counselling because this forum is more validating for WHO i am than who counsellors and psychologists have thought because I wasn't aware of the fact that these things were making things worse for me. What I actually needed and need was validation from a community who understand what it's like to be Autistic. I didn't realise how damaging it was for me to "do" what society expects and how damning it is to think I am broken because I cannot do what everyone else seems to do so easily. Stuff fitting in with what's expected. Lets celebrate out own talents like being a great support to each other. :-)