Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
This is first thing I've written here, please be gentle.
I have used alcohol to cope with my somewhat tumultuous life since I was 25. I'm now in my 30s.
I have never entertained the thought that I might be on the spectrum until recently (the past year) when, not only my friends suggested it, but also when I tentatively mentioned it and my own brother didn't bat an eye and said "yeah maybe".
I'm a little shocked and intrigued. I've since spoken to a specialist who just happened to be a friend of my friend - the conversation I had with her felt so relaxed and like a relief. She even said she'd gone through a period of drinking before she was diagnosed.
I'd really be interested to hear if anyone else has had issues with alcohol
It's not really about wanting to drink per se - it's the focus that it gives, and the relief from all the thoughts and feeling uncomfortable.
To level out this post, I'll also add that I'm a grown woman with values and good cognitive reasoning - I've also achieved good things in my life - but not as many as I intended!!
H x
I have used alcohol as a 'social crutch' my whole adult life. If I'm unstressed I tend to drink around a bottle of wine in a week, well under the 14 units recommended limit. If I have a stressful social or work event , say a get together of my wife's extended family, a high-level work meeting or if I have to give a seminar, I self medicate with alcohol to take the edge off my anxiety. I am good at hitting the right amount of alcohol to remain effective, but sufficiently unstressed to avoid panic attacks etc. I attempt to avoid drinking too much and becoming drunk, but if I do I am neither belligerent nor morose, I just get very talkative and have a tendency to be silly.