Phone calls dread

I use online chat help as much as possible, but sometimes you have to call someone.  My GP Surgery decided to put in a call waiting system over the pandemic with the most suicide inducing pan pipe music I have ever heard.  It now has a message about how the staff don't like being abused over the phone.  Obviously if they got rid of the music, the amount of abuse might drop. After 20 mins of pan pipe music I just want to flip out.

At least the hospital let you press # to switch off the music.

The other day it was the Indian HMRC scammers that called.  I forgot where I was for a second and when Sanjay told me he was calling from HMRC about a court case for unpaid tax, I was happy to tell him he wasn't from HMRC and he should F Off.  My parent's looked at me like WTF.  To be fair this was 10 mins after I got out of bed and before my first coffee.

I can relate to this like many others also do. I hate talking on the phone, causes to much anxiety and leaves me feeling shattered and edgy after. If I do have to talk on the phone I make it short and end the call asap. Personally, I much more prefer texting people.

I broke down crying yesterday after making a simple phone call. I am fed up with this, because I know how to do it and I have had loads of practice, but the stress takes it out of me every time.

Yes yes yes

I hate making and taking phone calls n avoid it at all costs. They so stressful and almost bring on panic attack if I'm not careful

Texting is far easier for me but even that causes me to be anxious if it's with someone i don't no well.

If I ever do end up on the phone chatting I'll make the call as short as pos and hang up as soon as I can.

Again - rather easy with a classic switchboard and immediate operator/receptionist. Do these therapists provide practicing working with 9 options, none of which have anything to do with WHY you're actually phoning? Or how to deal with companies who do not take responsibility for their services causing me extra time and money? Or how to deal with ear piercing tones and inappropriate musak? 

To help their patients cope with the fear of the phone, many psychotherapists use cognitive behavioral therapy methods. The doctor asks patients to describe the disturbing thoughts they have in connection with telephone conversations and discuss the worst possible scenarios. Over time, they practice and start making small calls - for example, ordering pizza. And at first, he does it using a fake phone number generator, and only then from his phone number. The doctor advises you to understand how the caller can be useful for the person on the other end of the wire.

Yep, it comes in very handy sometimes.

That's a good idea about putting mobile on "do not disturb", had no idea that I could do that! :-)

I know if I have to call someone (if they are not really into emailing or messaging) I have to prepare myself.  Could you write a letter to your aunt or send her the odd card letting her know that you're thinking of her.

Wow that sounds frustrating and must be draining to listen to.  Don't blame you for changing your number!

I'm not keen on Zoom either or video calls on Microsoft Office, I always turn my video off (even though at times I get told off for that)

Same here, functional calls are ok like making appointments or if I have to call about something specific to do with work.

Yes same here, when I see a number I don't recognise I always think it might be one of those annoying sales people or a scam.  Wow same here, I struggle to know when to end a phone call as sometimes I think if I end the call too soon I'm being rude or abrupt or if I end it too late I'm boring the person and dragging the call out.

Yes, I can relate!  I avoid making phone calls when I can, and often have my mobile on “do not disturb” so that I won’t receive any.

If I absolutely have to make a phone call, it’s usually super-rehearsed beforehand so that I can at least get my part right!

Would much rather use email.

I can certainly relate to this.  I hate talking to anyone other than my husband and sons on the phone.  I've always preferred texting to talking.  I get so anxious on the phone and I now very rarely pick up my house phone because of it.  Texting for me is just so much easier.

I find ending calls awkward as well, especially work calls. I have no idea why!

Yes, I've always found phone calls difficult. If my internet goes down for example and I have to call their helpline I'll start sweating and feel panicky. I only recently got a mobile phone but I've only given my number to 4 family members as I don't want people calling me for a long chat as I find those boring.

It seems to be quite a common thing amongst people on the spectrum (really its a colour wheel - me being pedantic). I dread having to make phone calls, but I have less problem with incoming calls. However, in either case I have difficulty in maintaining conversations. I know I should ring my 90 year old aunt, who I'm very fond of, as she has been ill, but find it impossible.

I hate answering phones since I had problems with an ex neighbour who would ring me repeatedly and try to gossip for hours, I literally mean hours!  Small talk and gossip over and over again, round and round in circles.

In the end I changed my number.

Yes. Phone calls and their younger siblings like Zoom suck ass.

I can cope with brief functional calls like making an appointment, or work calls in my area of expertise. Otherwise they fill me with dread... especially when someone calls me since I can't prep myself for it.

Yes, I hate phone calls with strangers. Waiting for the call to come gives me anxiety, and dialling the number myself also fills me with dread. For me it gets better with exposure but then it gets worse if I don't do it for a while. 

In my first year of uni I imposed a regime of self-improvement on myself and I signed up to work phoning up alumni to schmooze them into making donations. I had to psych myself up to call every single number, and I ended each shift drenched in sweat. I also harmed alumni relations with my social blunders...