Medical Phobias and Access to Mental and Physical Health Care

I only have one medical phobia.  Needles.  i have so far been unable to get past it.  I have allergies and have to carry epipens for them, but am unable to use them due to this phobia.  Tried CBT to get past it, but that failed, because how do you do exposure therapy when you need to stick a needle in yourself?  They tried to give me a drug that had to be injected sub-dermally and well lets say that didnt work out full stop.

Im stuck with this problem.  I cant see any way of getting past it.  I never used to have the problem either.  I've jabbed myself maybe a couple hundred times with pens over the years, but one pen I used a couple of years back hit the bone in my leg and ever since then i cant physically bring myself to use the damned thing.

Goodness. I thought exposure therapy and CBT were different things. Was the CBT adapted for ASD?

I wasn't diagnosed at that point.  I can override the epipen thing, but I have to be not far off dying to do it.  Its only happened twice to that level and I did manage to stab it in before my airway closed off.  But for a standard level anaphylaxis someone else has to push.

Doing an injection in the stomach would be a bridge too far.  it was bad enough trying to do the sub-dermal injection.  i think intramuscular is a million times easier than subdermal and a lot less painful.

I think CBT and exposure therapy are different, but are often given together.  My therapist tried to find some way of exposing me to needles, but I dont have a problem with holding needles or using a dummy pen.  My problem is using the real thing.  My brain knows a dummy pen has no needle so why would it fear it.  Same goes for holding a needle.  I suspect the only way i will ever get over this is to grab a load of saline and a box of syringes and learn to shoot up saline.  A relative who is a doctor said that was how he got over his fear of needles.  He practiced doing a canular on his friend and then vice versa, many times over a year and then extrapolated out by doing it on himself and giving himself vitamin shots.  After a year of doing it he no longer even thought about the actual needle anymore.  For me it would be hard to do that.  Maybe too hard.

One of the joys of adrenaline is you cant faint, or at least i have never done so.  It gets you so amped up, its like being wired into everything.  I once had a bad reaction while trekking abroad, had to use a lot of pens and take a lot of tablets.  Was in a hostel hundred or so miles from the nearest hospital, definite airlift situation if i'd gone down that route and I did have insurance for that eventuality, but instead i got drunk and took all the meds.  Walked 30 miles the next day with a heavy pack.  Thats adrenaline for you.  A temporary superman buff.

One of the joys of adrenaline is you cant faint, or at least i have never done so.  It gets you so amped up, its like being wired into everything.  I once had a bad reaction while trekking abroad, had to use a lot of pens and take a lot of tablets.  Was in a hostel hundred or so miles from the nearest hospital, definite airlift situation if i'd gone down that route and I did have insurance for that eventuality, but instead i got drunk and took all the meds.  Walked 30 miles the next day with a heavy pack.  Thats adrenaline for you.  A temporary superman buff.