Published on 12, July, 2020
Yo guys, its Wei. 20 years old male.
Today, I have gone to a mental health service and it wasn't very helpful in my opinion because all she did was telling me what i already know and that the thoughts that gone through my brain was all false which i disagree but it was clear i suffer from Asperger and she wasn't a GP so it was a "solution" attempt she said so she wasn't able to give me a prescription. (Read my previous post if you want more information on my situation)
But i have been watching videos of a clinical psychiatrist and also a professor of a university so he teaches lectures and records them on YouTube, name Dr Jordan Perterson. After watching and follow up some of his many works the past month i have found some encouragement in me and like to move forward but just in case my plan is terrible so i'd ask for some advice here and thanks in advance.
I am currently studying Games Technology and its quite likely that i am going to be required to resit even if i try to work for it right now because I have almost 0 knowledge of what is going on and the project deadline is in 6 days. So instead of trying so hard on this course that i chose to be my escape from reality as it is an introvert course dealing with computers that doesn't require much social interaction. i'll like to face my problems from now on and do what i think i'd want to do and want to give my all at.
My plan is instead of fighting a loosing battle or attempt to fight it again, i'll move toward a new course, i don't know what University i will be going to study this but its going to be Psychology. I will like to know more about my thoughts and myself by learning this course and i am going to try to read books, hard books that I never did before. But before going to University, i will take a year gap for once and take it easy for a year from studying, potentially sort my life out while prepare and research more on the topic of psychology and do readings about it. When i go to the University i plan to at the start of every module/lecture i'll introduce myself to everyone that i suffer from Asperger and would like to make friend with everyone despite having difficulty associating with people and hope many of them would accept it.
What are your thoughts on this? Please give me any advice or insight you think is appropriate. (This is a bit leading opinion but in another words, i am giving up on current course and try to persuade myself that i can move on and do better)
I will try and face this difficult path and get pass the fear of failure for real this time is what i believe right now.
Hi Wei,
I may be rather unpopular with this but thought I say it anyway (well, yes, that's me...). I've got two friends who studied psychology and when they had to decide for a uni they went to a fair few open days. So obviously these are events where the unis try to attract students, and the ones my friends went to did exactly that. However, in the events aimed at wannabe psychology students they kept saying that studying psychology is to enable you to work in this area afterwards (after some more hands-on training and all that, and not expecting everybody to become a psychologist of course), but that the courses are not aimed at people that come there to get their own issues fixed. Apparently they usually start with a large number of students of that sort and they drop out one after the other. Not necessarily because they can't keep up (that would probably apply to others too) but because they just don't really learn what they want to know. Or maybe they do a little bit here and a little bit there, but it's quite sparsely scattered. So while I totally agree with AngelDust that a bit of psychology would do everybody quite good I'm not sure if the same applies to a university degree. So the idea to do it on GCSE level is probably quite good, then you know a bit better what it's like (although uni may still be rather different). The other thing you could perhaps do is just sitting in some psychology lectures if nobody minds.
But maybe you need rather some proper advice before starting course #4. Psychology is not going to fix the problems you had with the other courses. A games technology course being full of people similar to you isn't the reason why you have no contact with others because even though the percentage of your sort of students will be higher on that course than on many others there are still plenty of people that are not like this. More people that all that socialising really easy do not automatically mean that it will all be easier because they make very quickly lots of friends so they don't need to spend the effort to give you extra time and encouragement. They'll probably be very happy to invite you to lots of things but unless you do actually go there this will make little difference and they will soon stop asking. And if the things you get invited to are not your cup of tea then even going there may not improve things that much.
Given that finance/accounting, computer science, games technology and psychology are really quite different subjects it would probably be important to figure out what you are actually interested in and where you could perhaps see yourself working (roughly what sort of job/in what field). Apart from that the way it's taught and the size of the courses would also be quite important (psychology bachelor courses are often rather big - that increases the risk of "disappearing"). Then you need to get support, someone who understands your issues, can help you to structure things so you don't start falling behind, helps you to integrate better... whatever it is that you need. Psychology may well be the perfect subject for you, who knows (I'm not sure you do either), but it is certainly not going to replace this support.
Hope I'm not pulling you down with this, but I thought these are things you need to think about before spending some £9000 and another year of your life (it's not so much about the time but the negative experiences that you don't want to repeat).
Hey, thanks for your insight.
What you have said pretty much what I have already thought over and over and over again to try to clarify to myself that if i am doing the right thing.
I may not know what they teach in Psychology but I am aware that it will not teach me about Asperger or ASD or any of this sort deeply or even touching it at beginning. It is going to teach about mix of neuroscience, how brain works, psychopathology, criminals and crimes, human behaviour etc. So i think i'm ready to accept the fact that it will not teach me what I want but it will get me started toward what I want to learn. Becoming a psychologist wasn't my goal, I'll like to aim for Psychiatrist which need a master degree and a PhD, that is really where I will begin to learn what I really want but before that foundation are important too.
About seeking advice, I have some person in mind to talk to and i even plan to go back to my high school teachers to ask for advice. My parent has a friend who is a professor that works in the field of science and teaches a University, i am planning to get full insight of how study works from master and PhD see if i anything i can prepare for it. Never in my previous courses I have thought so deep into seeking knowledge about it.
My reason of studying wasn't for money or to live richly, having a big house, nice car, branded clothing etc, it was never what i wanted. The previous courses are of money making kind of study for me. But psychology has a meaning to it for me, I want to help myself, understand how normal people (that doesn't suffer from Asperger for instance) thinks and hopefully help people with mental health issues.
I understand that the risk is high and there is no plan B after it but I have a feeling it will all go well if i try. After understanding that I have Asperger last week i feel like my life changed, its hard to describe but to put it lightly, it's like realising the Earth is round for the first time, its due to my realisation of what and why was my life like the way it is. It simply just hit me so hard and woke me up is what i feel like, its hard to describe sorry.
I'm aware to not be influenced by others quickly which I was in the past and even mimic their speeches but as you can see that I was able to disagree with what my psychiatrist said to me so I realise I have my own believes now so don't hesitate to give me real advice and thanks again <3