Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
I'm 38 and following chatting to a friend recently diagnosed with high functioning autism and doing a lot of research I'm reasonably sure I have aspergers. I'm in two minds about actually seeking a diagnosis but that's probably another discussion altogether.
One big issue I've had for a number of years is bad reaction to noise caused by other people, although in specific circumstances. The usual thing is if I perceive it as someone being unreasonable (linking to the known issues with people 'not playing by the rules') so even if it's not very loud it can cause problems. This has led to quite violent reactions and sometimes I don't always remember the entire episode, I'm guessing it's effectively a meltdown but I experience extreme anger towards the source of the noise. A classic example would be neighbours playing loud music, even if it's a few doors down the road having a bbq at 3pm on a Sunday afternoon.
I'm due to be seeing a psychiatrist soon to have an assessment related to these specific issues (so not specifically for anything asd although I have mentioned I think I may be on the spectrum).
I'm wondering if anyone else has experienced similar issues and if so if they found a way to cope. I've had brief sessions of cbt over the phone before but it didn't help. It was all based around me being the issue not the people being noisy and the problem is because I believe it's the other people being unreasonable so it went agianst what I believe.
Thanks for all your replies.
Tom your experiences definitely resonate a lot. I work in London and I'm fine when it's busy and noisy generally but then someone talking on their phone or listening to music on a train really gets to me. I think some of it is genuinely people being inconsiderate but my reactions in some cases are probably a lot more extreme than just getting angry. With the last incident my wife nearly called the police as she was scared for our kids safety because of how angry I was. I don't believe I would have done anything to hurt my kids but as I don't remember a lot of it it's hard to express what was going through my mind at the time.
Edit: I've had a hearing test which came back normal and also seen a hearing therapist who explained about auditory filters and how mine probably open fully a lot more which results in everything becoming overwhelming very quickly which helped a lot understanding that (and one of my things is having to know how things work).
I've done a lot of online tests and score highly for aspergers in all of them. And a lot of the questions about things ring true. My issues with diagnosis lie with being labelled as having a disability of sorts, and how that would impact my life, for example would I have to declare it on my driving licence, at work etc? But I also see the positive of possibly being able to get help and support.
I'll see how the psych assessment goes next week and take things from there.