Dad just died

He sounds such a lovely person, it is a gift to make people laugh. 

I'm also sorry you don't have someone at home to talk about it with, like everyone says, thank you for sharing your memories of him here, he sounds so special. Little things can be just as special to remember, favourite things you can hold on to and cherish. 

I hope your son deals with it in his own way too, grief is so individual as to what you need. 

Yes, I have found that too. Other people don’t bring the unhelpful attached baggage to the situation.

It’s wonderful that you and your sister have happy memories of your Dad’s impact on the world — making people smile and laugh — his priceless gift to you, your family and others he knew or met.

So sorry you are going through losing your dad without anyone who can sit with you as you go through this.

I hope you keep talking on here.Sending you a warm hug.

He always made everyone laugh. When I am looking at pictures people are smiling because he just said something to get them going. 

I am grieving alone as my husband walked out on me 2 years ago. 

My 16 year old son is autistic too , he has been good at giving cuddles but he has never really shown outward emotions so he doesn't really know how to deal. I let him carry on with his VR. 

I'm so sorry to hear, it must have been such a terrible shock. It's something that you weren't alone at the time. 

Sharing stories together of him, with your sister and family might give you some good things to think about. And if you want to, you can tell us about him. Take care.

Hang in there! Words mean nothing!


Take whatever time, you need, to process.

Sometimes sharing with people who aren't close to the situation really helps. It brings a different perspective on the situation 

I inherited his brilliant sense of humour & I am sure my autism came from him & his mum although they weren't diagnosed 

Please accept my condolences

1stly, Hes not gone.

.. I hope, although it doesn’t feel this way at the moment, you will come to realise that he lives on through you. Through those he knew and through contributions through others.

You make have heard that we don’t die once, we die twice. We die in person, and there comes a day when you are mentioned by name a final time.. I suppose when the relevance of that person comes to an end.

For me, this isn’t exactly true.. but there is a lesson in here.

I lost my father in a sudden and unexpected way. I feel now, that it’s incumbent on me to take the good and the bad and channel his input into this world, laid into the woodwork and foundations of everything I do.

To some degree we actually can’t help but follow in our parents footsteps.. but what we CAN do.. is understand that they did their best, it was different for them and if your here, they have done somthing right.

The fact your missing him, tElla me he has done some amazing work.

When that bubbles up to being your main takeaway.. everything changes and you feel pride, responsibility and reverence for those that came before. For those that built things in such a way, that you can see its significance.

We only have to change one life to do the right thing..

Sounds like your father changed yours x

hope that helps ..

I am sorry that this has happened and that you are shocked and grieving.

People who have gone through grief and have studied the grieving process talk about ‘staying with the grief’, i.e., not trying to push it away, just feel it and observe it. The intense grief will pass. You will get through this. 

It’s good that you are sharing your feelings here. If it helps, you can keep coming back to share more about how you feel, but you don’t have to. 

I am sorry that this has happened. I would suggest that there is free counselling available like with Age concern or a bereavement cafe or grief cafe's in some areas.

Yes. Unexpected.  He was 76. 

Only my sister & I that were closest. Him & Mum divorced when we were young.  

I'm so sorry to hear that. My own parents are elderly, and I'm dreading getting similar news.

The NAS does have some advice (including links to other resources) - I hope something there is helpful:

NAS - Bereavement

You keep on crying and grieving, be kind to yourself a cornerstone to your life has just gone and it will take a while for you to stop feeling wobbly. There's no right or wrong way to grieve, just feel what you need to feel, share it with family and don't be afraid to laugh at good memories and eventually you'll remember the good times more than the shock of his passing, which I'm guessing was sudden and unexpected? The next few weeks will probably give you some more answers, like what caused his death, which may give you some comfort.