Looking for advice after difficult Occupational Health experience (autism)

Hi ava

The experiences you describe are upsetting and very familiar to me.

I coincidentally had an OH appt. myself today 

Happy to share some take learning opportunities I picked up.

If the OH appt is arranged by referral from manager I believe one may be entitled to know what this states in advance of the appt.  Making sure this is open and is what one expects can help prepare.

One may also be entitled to support at the meeting.  In my case it was a phone conversation and retrospectively learned i could have linked a third party to it.  In that case personally a Union representative would have been good.  (Having previously tried to get local autism support services involved and they were not rushing to act in that situation.)

Little information was available to the assessor except for that I was able to present (e.g. access to my medical information despite me previously having given consent for this)  I recommend having a written list of response already prepared for questions about diagnoses etc may benefit (in the UK one can access one's own GP records if registered to do so)

From the perspective of an occ health assessment such as this their role is to report to the employer about recommendations - then up to the employer to follow these after discussion with employee.

Hard to say but I strongly suspect the situation you describe is likely one shared by many autistic people and their loved ones.  This is really sad and upsetting and also makes me a bit angry.

Having been in the same situation myself w/r/to work, anxiety, I suspect depression post diagnosis and finding the whole thing completely overwhelming I can say that things for me have got better if that helps.  

I had to prioritise recovering from burnout, I have come to realise how much of my life was spent in "survival mode" - I came up with this 

To "survive burnout phoenix-style" means to recover and rise from it by first prioritizing rest and self-care, then setting realistic expectations and boundaries, seeking support from others, and finally reflecting on and reassessing your goals to rebuild a more balanced life that aligns with your values. This process takes time and involves self-reflection, reconnecting with passions, and celebrating small wins to find renewed joy and meaning.

Best wishes to you and yours

I agree - it really does feel like there’s an unwritten rule of shutting people down through poor service. He’s going to reject the latest OH report, as it’s full of inaccuracies, and raise a formal complaint within the organisation for now. I’m not sure yet whether it’s worth taking it higher (and I don't know where to), as it often feels like you end up battling a system that protects its own. I’m handling everything at the moment because he’s really not doing well after that meeting. Thanks so much for your input.

Thanks Lotus - that’s really helpful. Unfortunately his autism wasn’t taken into account at all until he had a formal diagnosis, and that was my experience at work too. We know the law is on our side now, but finding the strength to keep pushing against the system is exhausting. Thanks again for your support.

Thank you Lain, I agree that this feels like a reflection of the bigger picture in society, sadly. I appreciate your suggestions - that’s very much the approach we’re planning to take. The emotional toll has been huge, but we’ll be feeding this back and asking for someone with appropriate understanding next time. 

Hi Mr T and thanks for your reply. He did receive the report yesterday, but unfortunately it’s still full of inaccuracies. This was actually his second appointment because he kept asking for his own words to be recorded. He even brought a list of issues, but the OH clinician wouldn’t let him speak and shut him down. A formal complaint is our next step I guess.

Hi Olivia,
Thank you for your message and for sharing the link - it was really helpful.
Best wishes,
Ava

I think there's some kind of unwritten rule in play about making services so unfriendly and passive aggressive that you retreat in confusion and don't come back. Whatever someone asks for in terms of help or support the answer always seems to be, 'it's not my job' or 'we don't do that', well who does do it then?

It's appalling the way your husband was treated, is there anyone you can appeal or complain too?

Hi and welcome to the community. I'm sorry to hear about this difficult experience.

Occupational Health will of course report back to the employer, however getting reasonable adjustments shouldn't just be based on that report. I found an article which gives some guidance:

https://www.unwildered.co.uk/legal-blog/autism-at-work-how-to-get-the-right-reasonable-adjustments-(and-what-to-do-if-you-re-struggling)

I hope that this is of some help and wish you both all the best.

ava said:

There was a strong focus on paperwork, consent, and closing things off

This is very much the box ticking approach used by OH in my experience. They are designed to help the majority and as an autistic minority we are often left with staff who do not actually understand our complex needs so we only get the standard approach which has led to the experience you have here.

This is a one size fits all appoach unfortunately and there seem few staff who really understand autism well enough to have a positive interaction with us.

I think the fact this does not realy help your husbands situation is more a reflection of how much autism is not understood and how little companies like OH will adapt their services to accommodate these needs.

Can you fault OH for this? Only a little in my opinion. They could do a lot better certainly but they are merely a refection of the bigger picture in society. Positive feedback and a request for someone with training in handling autistic people would be how I would approach this. Tell the their procedure seems OK but the way it was delivered was too rigid and you need someone who knows how to interact with an autistic person in distress for it to be meaningful for you.

With this feedback they may re-evaluate and help and this can lead to an additional bit of push to improve their training.

The real challenge for them is that every autist is different and have different needs so training their staff to help is an open ended task in some ways and needs skills that are probably beyond their job description.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

Have you received a written report from OH? If not request one. It will detail the advice the OH has given to your employer. If you are still not satisfied request a follow up appointment to explain the issues. 

Might be a good idea to write a list of issues to discuss.

I have found my experience with OH to be generally supportive but my employer did not follow the advice given, but that is another story.

Dear Ava,

Thank you for reaching out, it sounds like this was a very stressful appointment and I am sorry to hear how hard it was made for your husband. It must have been difficult to hear a health professional be dismissive when your husband actively ask for help.

Whilst we wait to see if the online community has some helpful advice I have attached the link for Autistic fatigue and burnout and Anxiety that may be worth taking a look at.

Best wishes,

Olivia Mod