Summer depression

The thing about winter is that if you are cold you can just get all wrapped up to the perfect temperature and if you get hot it’s fast enough to cool down. In summer it’s just too hard to get that cool temperature! Like fans and them just aren’t the same

That totally makes sense with this creep manager! My mum has said he’s just a big deluded liar and has his own mental issues but he wanted to dump his problems on me. Also probably because I never showed interest and my body language was more closed around him that didn’t help either. I would hate to live in his mind. I also want to mention that he would trip me up so he would catch me, upset me to make me cry so he had excuses to hug and kiss me. I’m q sorry you have been told the same things as me and well done for not giving into those voices. I just want my opinions and way of thinking back and validated.  

As for high end stuff, I’m not one that’s into all the fashion and high end cars etc. I’d rather save my money to things that would make me happy and I prefer to not be noticed as I don’t want attention and to come across as a diva! I don’t even drive so I can’t have a car lol but my mum has an 18 years old old Toyota and ok it’s not as good as it used to be but say don’t need all these stupid gizmos but now that’s all cars seem to have and then make the cars more pricy! 

The heat could be a sensory issue causing you even more discomfort and dis-regulation. This is especially uncomfortable if you cannot escape it and find a nice cool place. Are you in any sort of therapy for the issues with the bullying? I think bullying should be a crime in itself, however I don’t think we have enough judges available to deal with the toxicity of society.

We’re only liars but we’re the best 

wete only good for the latest trends

and you can have almost famous friends 

besides we have such good fashion sense

yeah sorry I just have a lyrics for everything don i 

I see in my shop designer labels come and go obeyed,billionaires boys club, white fox etc

i orefer in branded clothes in hide patterns or palin nice cookouts or band tv show shirts etc (I have loads of band ones I want atm like Taylor switch my Chen Olivia Rodgeria and black sabbith also whitty pubs like ad/hd or autism 3:16

I have never bought into the whole fashion branded / luxury brands / designer labels way of thinking (and I have made older adult bones just fine without them, thanks all the same - so I don't envisage changing my outlook on that topic).

I do not consider what other people will think of the things I buy or wear.  They are my £'s and I make sure that budget serves my best interests.

My shopping research for items might consider: best value / most reliable / best for the task.

I am happy to save up for / budget towards / wait for something I need or want.

Usually, I will defer a purchase - rather than buy a "disposable fashion" version acting on impulse.

I have always opted for a very ordinary car - so I can park it anywhere I need to without attracting attention - therefore, not worrying that it would ever likely be top of the theft target list.

My one "exception to the rule": I am prepared to put a seriously greater budget towards the precise make and model of good quality trekking trainers - as I use them most times that I leave the house - as they are the only ones which do not damage my feet.  People are less likely to have heard of them - as they are not in fashionista territory.  However, if I am in a proper outdoor equipment supplies shop - an observant assistant might ask me for my road trast feedback ("excellent").  I always have one pair in active regular use, plus one new pair at home - in reserve as back up in case the current pair were to develop an issue.  Here is the clue though: they don't let me down - as they are extremely well designed and manufactured (I feel; as reflects well: their company's almost 350 years of experience).  I never imagined (when I bought them) just how many trouble-free years of good service they would provide me.  Yes, they are the single most expensive thing which I buy - but at a cost per wearing calculation - they have definitely proved to be excellent value.  (My feet thank me every time I wear those particular trekking trainers!).

I have one particularly irritating relative who, nearly every time I see them, apparently can't resist overbearingly promoting to me; some wretched brand whose TV marketing and social-climbing allure must have appealed to their suggestibility ...back off woman, don't interfere with my footcare!

Reading about people's experiences and feelings, makes me wonder if summer SAD isn't a part of the ASC spectrum? I know its not there officially, but maybe it should be, I've never known so many people all suffering the same things and nobodies told us to shut up and stop complaining,,,yet.. probably because the mods would stop them.

One of the things I hate is being sweaty, because of low BP my blood dosen't circulate as fast as people with a higher BP, so less sweat evaporates and I overheat and feel horribly garmsy and sticky.

Antoher thing I feel is the unrelenting strength of the sun like a hamer beating down on me, hats, sunglasses when they don't slide down my nose in the tsunami of sweat dripping off the end of it, being in a basement, somewhere I still know it's there, I still know it's light outside and hot.

For us autists(autistic artists? Haha thats my new meaning for that one) the heat sensations of summer are bad although I so love being toasty warm i  winter in summer it’s too hot wirh little to no off switch 

I don't know, I guess it like those hairless cats, they do everything a normal cat does, they just don't look right. I think you'd have to go a very long way back into prehistory to find a time before people made clothes, clothes and personal adornment go back a very long way.

Elfis, I've had a lot of the same comments over the years about how I must be jealous of other peoples stuff and looks and that I'm in some kind of weird denial, anything but the truth, that I just don't care that much. Of course we all like nice things, but my perception of nice is different to that of many others, I have an 11 year old skoda, it needs work doing to it this year for its MOT, but so what, it's my car, it does what I need it to do, I don't want something new, or with a big badge etc, I certainly don't want all the tech gizmo's.So what if you don't have loads of money? Do you want to end up as the richest person in the graveyard at the end of it all? Far better to live a good life, by your own standards not anyones elses and certainly not the likes of him.

I think your former manager has more issues that he thinks you have, just think of what the inside of his head must be like and be glad you don't live there! It must be an absolute sink of fear, hatred and self loathing. Maybe whenever his voice creeps into your head, just as back into the void, 'and whats your problem?

TheCatWoman said:

I actually don't like the amount of flesh on display I don't think it's prudishness, it just seems wrong somehow, people are meant to wear clothes

I'm curious as to why you believe this. Can you elaborate please?

My perspective is that we are descended from creatures who never wore clothes, are born without them and they are largely ornamental other than when used for weather protection.

Aww thank you for your kind words! I’ve just been taking my chances of leaving the windows open to remove the smell and I’ve also used wax melts and diffusers with cents of either lavender or even baby powder oil which is actually really nice! Once everyone is gone I will have a good proper clean again but will need to steam and use the carpet cleaners! Think my parents are going to deduct money for the poor service but not sure. Might give the walls a sponge down myself too. 

Elfilis said:

Wish we could just decorate like in animal crossing

I know right?! That’d be so much better. Just toss a leaf on the ground and wham, you’ve got a new set up.

I’d let your landlord know ahead of time about the rubbish in your sinks. They might be more understanding if there ends up being leaks/clogs if you warn them ahead of time. When I once got an apartment that smelled strongly like smoke we fixed the issue by sponging down the walls gently. 

Well, I’m still wishing you the best. Keep reminding yourself that it can’t last forever and someday soon you’ll be back in your home.

I’m at my nans flat whilst she’s at her caravan but I just want to be back in mine as I just feel out of a routine! I mean I don’t mind if I’m out of routine or things get altered etc but when things like this drag out it’s so distressing! I just want to do all my exercise games and maybe start a new fresh routine! But I’ll have to get rid of the smoke smell first but that’s not going to be until everyone has gone. I have put signs up which they have got offended by and also they keep throwing rubbish down the sinks, bath and toilet which is annoying as my bathroom is new as well and the things they throw down can clog my drains and I’m not no doubt going to be responsible for leaks! I tried to convince my parents to swap to an other company but annoying they had signed a contract so we can’t pull out. Wish we could just decorate like in animal crossing

I’m not too bad in the winter (possibly due to my birthday and xmas) and I also love the snow and how quiet it is, but as TheCatWoman said, summer SAD doesn’t seem to be noticed and we are just told negative things. 

Whoa that sounds horrid. Having your place stink of smoke is awful and I’m so sorry. So you’re still at your family’s place?

Finally someone who gets what I’m saying! I never used to be bothered by all the branded stuff because I assumed it was all fake and to look as if they have money. As for the cars my parents tell me they are just rented again for show. But this former manager had manipulated me into believe I’m poor and fat and ugly and that I am jealous because I don’t have all the high end stuff and I’m jealous of all these people because apparently I think they are nice looking and I’m jealous but I always just saw these people as well I’ll just say it chavs! But now all I hear is that creep managers voice saying I’m worthless and poor and all that. 

With the body consciousness, I’m not the tallest of girls but I always used to do fitness like each day which had helped my mood and I actually noticed I was getting more toned and less bloated but then I would be told I’m fat and even had comments like “when’s the baby due” and stuff of that nature. I also hate the amount of flesh on display and all I see now are these girls either teens or twenties and they are all in their crop tops and shorts and though I personally don’t think they are slim or attractive, again I have these voices in my head telling me they are the ideal shape and I am not and I’m ugly and need work doing but then I be told I’m so ugly that no amount of surgery would make me beautiful! I mean all these girls just have so much Botox and lip fillers how is that a good look? I can’t help that I have thinner lips. I’m actually terrified of going out because of all the sights of flesh and how I don’t fit the ideal standards, and I’m dreading this will be the case on holiday because the creep manager had said I know deep down I think these girls and women are the attractive ones but I’m too jealous to admit. I’m thinking of getting either a swim costume or tankini and swim shorts because I’m that conscious but I can see myself just sitting in the room more than anything. 

And don’t get me started on BBQs, like everyone is having them each day and the smell lingers and then loads of people smoking cigarettes which make me feel sick as anything but now we have new neighbours who are burning plants and stuff and again it stinks so I can’t open my window! 

Wow I’m queen of the grumble today 

Aww the fall season can just be so beautiful and as you say just the perfect temperature and I also find it super cozy! For me it’s hot over in the north of uk but apparently the temperatures are finally meant to be dropping from tomorrow. It’s also bank holiday today so it’s super annoying and noisy. 

No the renovations haven’t gone well at all. The workers have mistreated my place and left it a mess, they have smoked in my place so my flat stinks of smoke, they keep ordering the wrong stuff and they keep asking me to do some work to save them work. The job was only meant to take two weeks and it’s now the fourth week and still not near completion. There’s been no communication with them either and now they have decided to go on holiday. But I can’t swap or get other workers due to the stupid contract. They said they had a team of workers who worked for the company but they don’t ugh

I think it’s part of season affective disorder as a kid I got it in winter now I get it mid summer 

Absolutely. At least this year I've not had problems swallowing or with bloating caused by drinking to much water, or with rashes from sweat no evaporating.

I don't feel bad because of other peopes stuff, I couldn't give a sh1t about people who are so shallow they can't see beyond the price tag of whatever someone owns. But I do get the body conciousness bit totally, whatever you wear someone won't like it and will shout their feelings at high volume, it's horrible. I've had to wait until I'm post menopausal for most of this unwanted and unwarrented attention to stop, being old and invisable definately has it's up sides. I'm sure niether of us are actually eyesores, but people feel emboldened in the sunshine to enforce somekind of dress code and body shape ideal, if I had to have a swimming cossie it would be a burkini, probably a two piece as one piece cossies are two short in the body and cut me up the middle, crawl up my bum and pull my shoulders down. But that would get me shouted at, I'd probably end up with some anti-Islamic lynch mob after me for not falling out of a tiny bikini

I actually don't like the amount of flesh on display I don't think it's prudishness, it just seems wrong somehow, people are meant to wear clothes. I wear long loose clothing in summer, I find it cooler than tiny tops and shorts and I'm not blinding anyone with the sun bouncing off my incredibly white legs, or offending them with scar tissue.

I get loads of gnat bites and stings too, I once counted 14 on the lower part of one leg alone, pale skin is thinner and the biting insects know it!

I don't like eating outside either, I don't want the sun in my face, or to be fighting off insects who also want my food, the smell of BBQ's makes me feel sick.

People sometimes wonder how and why I acquired such an extensive vocabulalry of insults and put downs, this is why.

Summer SAD isn't really recognised, probably because of the prevailing doctrine of sunshine making people happy, the only real reference I've ever found for it, is a small piece from an American psychiatrist who says it's a depressive disorder, well duh! No questions of curiosity about why people struggle, just more of the same, must be miserable and a killjoy.

Oh no, so the renovation didn’t go well?

Also yes, summer is awful. I get seasonal depression in summer and winter, as I tell others: It’s at its worst during the solstices. I can’t wait for fall to start. We finally have a nice cool day here in the Midwest today after months of baking, so it’s giving me a taste of fall a bit early.