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'What do you do?' Being defined by your job

TheCatWoman

I dread this question when meeting people for the first time, what do I say? I'm not working and haven't for a while due to all my health probems ganging up on me, so do I say that, (usually) do I say what my last job was, self employed hairdresser, what my current and over riding interests are gardening, cooking and history, so should I say I'm a gardener, a cook or an historian? Do they count as I'm not paid for any of them. Or should I say that I'm a human being rather than a human doing?

Why is it so important to NT's to know what work you do, what your profession is so as they can decided whether to talk to you or at you or walk away and ignore you? The only equivalent I can think of for ND's would be 'whats your special interest?'

What do you say when asked this question? 

Do you conform and say what your paid work is/was? 

How do you feel about having to play this game?

Does it put you off socialising?

Parents

  • I don't know why people feel obliged to answer anything they don't feel comfortable with.

    If someone asks me something I don't like I am more than likely to say 'no' and end the conversation as the two people from the Jehovah's Witnesses will tell you that called at the weekend.   Why stand there squirming when you know how the conversation is going to end??  Get that door shut, and get rid. 

    Same when people used to call you and try and sell things.  Just cut the call.   Just delete the email.  If someone asks you something that isn't their business you could actually ask them something that certainly isn't yours (to get your own back) or simply say "what's yours, putting your nose where it isn't wanted?"

    This may sound terribly rude but if it was a friend of mine they'd already know and if they aren't my friend, it's not their concern?   Isn't that right? 

    Why the dread?  The dread comes from feeling you have to conform to social graces & all that guff   

    I actually feel better now I've got that off my chest Smiley

  • in reply to overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U )

    I wish at times I could do that but most of the time I  don’t want to come across as being rude. I can tell myself I shouldn’t care what people think but most of the time I do…..

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