Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, advice needed!
I recently joined a social group for autistic people at my university, the first meeting was more enjoyable than I anticipated but I really struggled with one of the participants who had a loud voice. While I don’t want to expect other people to have to mask a lot in this situation, I definitely felt uncomfortable and found it quite overwhelming. Would it be reasonable to ask the organisers if they could speak to this person (who has been going for longer than I have/seems to have a good rapport with the organisers/staff) and ask them to lower their voice? I feel like an ass asking them to moderate themselves in a group like this but equally I’d really like to keep going (I have very few friends my own age) and don’t want to snap at them by accident.
(please note I don’t think I’m the only person who felt a little like this, several other people also became more open/talkative after they left)
This was an interesting question. I have heard it said that people with autism tend to get along better with other people with autism, but it has been my experience that this isn't necessarily true.
While one would hope that other autistic people would understand where we're all coming from, the reality is that we're people who just happen to be autistic.
Having said this, I don't think it would hurt if you were to speak to the people who organized this social group. I suspect that the worst that could happen would be that they would say no.