Published on 12, July, 2020
When people talk about emotions, I express my opinion logically, but they respond by saying I'm an exception, that I'm different. I’ve realized that while everyone seems to have something to live for, I don’t. My mother only urges me to work, but I don’t have the money to enjoy life. I wake up just to work, and sleep only to wake up for work again. I don’t love anyone; I feel completely empty..
How can i fix it?
I am going to be autisticly honest.
Ive tried to commit suicide a couple of times but failed, happy i failed.
I sold everything i had and started to travel and worked remotely, seing another perspective of life and other cultures changed everything.
It is weird when you are from Sweden where people stand 15 feet away from you at the bus stop and never says hi or talks, they avoid you and thats Swedes.
I relocated to Hungary and i didnt know anyone and not the language either. But every single person came to knock on my door and welcome me, Ive never had so much food in my life, they all came with things they cooked at home, alcohol etc.
They were basically autistic people, no filters and i literally felt like i was home.
Changed my perspective and i noticed that its just where i am at that sucks and its not for me.
Trust me my family, friends literally everyone tried to stop me and told me i am not going to make it, its dangerous etc etc. Guess what?
They were dead wrong, way safer then Sweden, the people were amazing, the culture, food and the architecture was brilliant! I miss it badly, i am back in Sweden because my wife got kids and they need to grow up before we leave for spain.
Do you need a friend or just someone to rant to?
I am here and let me know if you want a way to direct message.
Life is f-ing hard, but its also f-ing beautiful
I dont want to miss a thing
White Trash Man said:Ive tried to commit suicide a couple of times but failed, happy i failed.
Can relate this to myself which is sad. In 2019 I was really unwell with the on going flu etc. Unfortunately beginning of the year 2024 i had the nasty coughing virus.
Takes time to heal and it's baby steps. Take things slowly. Taken me a while to go back watching crime programmes. Unfortunately I can't stay up to late than used to.
I will get back to you in the morning i promise, little bit short of time right now