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Finally had my assessment yesterday

Aurielle
22 days ago

I don't feel like it went well at all =(

I'm not contact with most of my family for various reasons, and so don't really have anyone thay can corroborate my traits having been there since childhood. Before my assessment I explained this, and gave phone numbers for my uncle (who I'm not sure how helpful he'd be, due to family issues I'm not sure he saw me much as a young kid), and a high school friend. I also spent a few hours writing down notes about all the traits and my struggles that I could think of. I was under the assumption people would have been contact and questions asked, plus my list read beforehand, and so didn't being them in to help me as I maybe should have.

I found it incredibly difficult thinking of a lot of it on the spot, and many of the questions didn't really lead to me discussing some of what was in my initial list. And so because I'd had a poor relationship with somewhat emotionally abusive parents, I was told that "I have autistic traits, but they could have been because of my parents mistreatment and it isn't clear that I have ASD". I waa also basically told that if is been assessed some years ago I'd have been diagnosed with Aspergers, but by today's DSM criteria, unless they get more info from my uncle and friend to prove early childhood traits, I don't get a diagnosis.

I feel very disheartened by this. A lot of my parents mistreatment of me, I feel, was exactly because I showed autistic traits, not the cause of them (such as them getting angry at me for replying words and phrases, or sometimes even sounds I'd heard from others, repeatedly listening to the same songs over and over, spending too much time in my room by myself, or the fact I'd flat out refuse to eat many foods because of their texture.)

I'm not sure what my next steps should be.

Have others struggled in similar ways to me? Or, managed go get a diagbosis despite not having anyone to prove early childhood experiences?

Is it worth me trying to seek out a 2nd opinion, or the fact I'm no contact with family just mean I get the same response?

Because of my troubles explaining myself in a verbal manner, I found it very stressful today and I'm scared also that seeking a 2nd opinion would just result in exactly the same.

Thanks in advance for any advice!

Parents
  • 22 days ago

    Hi and welcome! I have never even tried to seek a diagnosis, so can’t really say if it’s worth or not. When it comes to my family I was told many times that I’m a nerdy weirdo because I sit alone in the room and study my favorite things (at one time foreign language, at other time trams, models, history, etc, then encyclopedias etc or just creating something- painting, other manual work), I was also told that it’s annoying that I’m so dumb I take everything literally, that I don’t understand when someone is kidding or serious or annoyed etc. I was also told I’m terrible at social interactions, oversharing, being too direct. But when I informed my mom that my psychologist told me I’m probably autistic, she said that the psychologist is stupid. I remember from my childhood my teachers told my mom the suspect I’m autistic and she ignored that. I remember she prevented me from seeing a psychologist when I was a teenager and had awful meltdowns. So I suspect she knows that all along and keeps it secret from me. So I feel I relate in terms of family being unsupportive with getting diagnosis. I found an article about getting diagnosis, I couldn’t paste the link but I took screenshots of a part of it, maybe it helps a bit. 

Reply
  • 22 days ago

    Hi and welcome! I have never even tried to seek a diagnosis, so can’t really say if it’s worth or not. When it comes to my family I was told many times that I’m a nerdy weirdo because I sit alone in the room and study my favorite things (at one time foreign language, at other time trams, models, history, etc, then encyclopedias etc or just creating something- painting, other manual work), I was also told that it’s annoying that I’m so dumb I take everything literally, that I don’t understand when someone is kidding or serious or annoyed etc. I was also told I’m terrible at social interactions, oversharing, being too direct. But when I informed my mom that my psychologist told me I’m probably autistic, she said that the psychologist is stupid. I remember from my childhood my teachers told my mom the suspect I’m autistic and she ignored that. I remember she prevented me from seeing a psychologist when I was a teenager and had awful meltdowns. So I suspect she knows that all along and keeps it secret from me. So I feel I relate in terms of family being unsupportive with getting diagnosis. I found an article about getting diagnosis, I couldn’t paste the link but I took screenshots of a part of it, maybe it helps a bit. 

Children
  • 22 days ago in reply to Alienatedhuman

    Sounds a whole lot like me as a kid, yeah! Haha.

    He wasn't dismissive or anything like that. I think he probably did he best with what info I did manage to provide but.. 

    Given how much I struggled with discussion yesterday I feel like what I'd written up and sent to them prior had a lot more to go on and could have helped. And I worry a bit it hadn't been read, especially as they had to ask me again for people's phone numbers which should have been on my file...

    I hope I'll be able to ask for a second opinion and maybe I can prepare myself better next time.