Published on 12, July, 2020
Iv decided to do a forum on my wildlife holidays where I can tell you about my holiday rather than just sending pictures
cause iv been on lots of them this year rather than only sending photos. also proper trips il tell you about and add photos to go with it on this post aswell. cause it will be easyer and better for me but is also for holidays cause im going on lots of holidays this year and it deserves its own thread in this sense.
my first holiday I went on this year was Wales. I went to Snowdonia near the national park
we saw a lamma and a pony
with the view we got from the cottage we stayed in was of the sea
Jackdaws perched on the buildings when we watched tv we went for a walk and I got great pictures of the moutains
you could see them on the beach outline at the beach the waves I saw a literally called gray heron fly past
the waves crashed against the rocks and became fully submerged until they broke and forced its way over. my long lens saved my life by getting me up close enough to photograph the waders and I saw Great crested grebes.
back at the cottage herring gulls at Jackdaws
the next day we went to the waterfalls I saw yellow gorse.
the water level was high but not flooded. it was a adventure and the gorse made it look colourful
it was massive then we went down the mountain the next day we went to the sea again and I saw a cormerent. there was lots of bladder wrack which is a type of seaweed.
seaweed are actualy a type of algae. some can surve out the water for a certain period of time. others dont survive as well it depends on the type cause theres different types of seaweed.
this one is normaly mistake for seaweed but is actualy a type of animal instead
in July
im very used to wildlife watching in the uk and while I have been to menorca I havnt wildlife watched there cause I didnt have an interest in Wildlife then so this was my first time wildlife watching in a different country.
I allways have to wear ear defenders when i go to the air port but they had disability asistance. I had to improvise cause the person that supports me that went with me hasnt gone on holiday with me before and didnt know what to say or do with my sensory challanges at the airport. the person that was with me said she thinks il be fine but I knew cause of my autism cant deal with crowds so I said I have autism and I dont like crowds so would it be ok to go where its less busy or quiter and so she took me through. there was a point where we wernt sure if I had to take my ear defenders off at the part where you have to walk through and them see if you got metal on you so I asked the lady there if I could keep them on and she went off to ask the person behind the thing you have to walk through. I was very anxious at this point. it was time to put our items on the coveyerbelt and walk through the metal thing. The person with me for the holiday and me still didnt know so I was panicing inside and i was told to take them off by the person taking me which i was reluctant to do but the plaine lady came over and thumbed up us saying not to take them off and that i can keep them on and we went through. the flight was delayed by an hour. but it was no ones fault cause they had to help somone who couldnt walk onto the plane. so we walked and stopped every 5 minutes so people were joking about that and inpatient at the same time. eventually we got on though at last. I filmed the take off and we went over the bay of biscay on the way to Tenerife
when landing I saw mount tede from above the clouds.
the next day I saw a canarian chiffchaff
and I saw a Spanish sparrow for the first time. they were breeding at the hotel.
but one of my biggest highlights was snorkeling for the very first time
and the dolphins which i got to see for the very first time
and mount tede a active volcano with many species only found on that mountain I saw crystal on a rock
that was the last day. the next day we went on a trip but when it came to packing bags for the trip. I put my bag with the plastic bag on it ontop of my suitcase then gave it to her with the plastic bag on it but took it off and thought that she was going to put the bag in cause it didnt only have my stuff in the bag and as far as I knew the plastic bag was in the boot but at some point in the journey I wondered where the bag was and thought it might be in the boot cause i couldnt see it in the back. we checked the boot and it wasnt there.
my ear defenders got left behind which was problomatic cause the person with me wasnt willing to go back and get the ear defenders and soon we had to go to the air port. I was highly anxious and I found it diffucult getting her to understand the why it is important enough that we do have to go back anf get them we bought some silenceing headphones as an emergancy cause otherwise I wouldnt of been able to get on the plane. we went through disability asisstance. the plane was delayed by a couple of hours and we wernt able to get on until midnight. a teenager had a go in a wheelchair and a little boy was going up and down a slope behind me which i found acted as visual stimulation and made my anxiety worse. it isnt thetre fault its just cause im autistic but thanfuly things did cam down and at 12 o'clock we lined up and got on the plane and came back to the uk by 4 or 5 oclock in the morning.
The sad thing about this, Zo - is that it will seem like you are being 'difficult', when you are not being difficult. Or, at least, no more difficult than any other human being is.
I wouldn't like to be placed in a home with people I don't know - being autistic I am just like you on this and would have all the same sensitivities.
But even non-autistic people would feel very similar. I know that my wife wouldn't like it. I know that my brother wouldn't like it.
You are also scared of being alone. Again this sound 'difficult' because it contradicts the above. But I don't like being totally alone. My wife doesn't like being alone. My brother wouldn't like being alone.
The options that we have are not open to you at this time - meaning I can live with my wife. My wife can live with me, My brother can live with his family.
This must get you down. I actually think you are very brave and very resilient.
I hope that this puzzle can get solved for you (or by you)
In a change of subject - on wildlife. Have you ever thought of making your profile picture your favourite animal, or something like that?
sorry for the late response. Well the thing is its abit complicated. even though Wildlife is my speacial interest and I do do it as a hobby every couple of years I develop new ones. when I was a child cause i had a main special interest like i do today it can come across as being very limited as if its the only thing that im interested in in fact up until I was 14 Mum allways refered to me as haveng a limited range of interests even though I was of course interested in other things like Harry Potter and scooby do amoung others other than just Pokemon. I wouldnt watch new things so my intersts wernt as varied as you know when you have a special interest it is generally seen by society and neurotypicals and not to metion even described to them probably if they ever find out about autism that that interest is all the person ever talks about and that may be the case it can mostly be true except from the fact that as soon as i turned 14 and heard Mum say i only have a limited range of interests i begun to wonder what it would be like to watch things i havnt seen before and as a result my interests became more varied even though i usualy had a special interest and cause of my speacial interest whatever it was looked like that is the only thing i was interested in cause i rarely talked about anything else unless asked about what else im interested in. but cause of my speacial interest it can cause people to asume say that that is all your interested in. but in the now im going through a period a period of self growth in lockdown i discovered not only do I have gender dysphoria and am trangender i also discovered i have a different sexual or romantic orientation aswell at first i rushed abit and thought i already knew what it was due to both happening all at once but by the end of the year discovered it was something else and discovered that someone learning from me learning about myself discovered they had a different one also. in the same year and during 2022 and 2023 I also discovered that i dont just identify as male but also neither sometimes so also go by he him aswell as they them but identifying as neither sometimes but mainly identifying as male most of the time telling everyone about also identifying as neither would complicate things for the people around me who were only just understanding this whole transgender he him thing and transitioning I only started in 2020. and of course before a few years before lockdown I was learning about my family and gentics and family tree and what not and of coruse even though i know alot about myself im still on a journey of self discovery and is a very long journey this means im developing new interests aswell and so i also engage in my other interests not just wildlife and of course cause i have other speaical interests my (main) speacial interest and how it lasts can vary before another takes its place and ususaly i need to make sure there is room for any interests im developing aswell that i can also fixate on cause i can become too fixated on one particular interest so i dont know what i want my profile to be cause i have lots of different interests
things like self growth self discovery gaining more knoledge and exsperiance as you get older
It's great to expand your interests. There is also nothing wrong with having extra special interests too. After all, the great zoologists of the world all love wildlife.
The nice thing about profile pictures is that you can change them whenever you want. It's not as if you would be stuck with it forever.
It's also great about your self discovery and growth. A lot of autistics have similar thoughts about themselves. I spoke to a lady who is trans a week ago in my autistic group. We spoke about quantum mechanics and the mind for an hour.
Be sure to let us know about any new interests. Sometimes other people's interests spark an interest in me. I like to hear about them
yes I fixate on those aswell as they take over. it takes time for the interests to fully develop but I do lots of research on them before they then turn into proper long term hobbys. while they are developing I fixate on them mentaly and usualy engage with them either on my own but i never discuss them in my care home until they reach a certain stage and are fully dveloped. i need space until im ready to talk about them openly my interests usualy develop on my own first over the course of weeks or months before my family finds out about them. unless my Mum or dad watches or shows me something or whatever that instantly causes me to develop an interest then only my family knows until its fully established but usualy any new interests i have tend to be triggered by other interests i was either aware or not aware of haveing
its like cause and effect. for instance from watching scooby doo when i was a child i developed an interest in mysterys. knowing my interests are strongly influcened by exsernal factors plus self growth and discovery aswell certain themes iv allways been interested in im very careful about what people i asocsiate myself with interest wise or when it comes to tv amoung other things i also know what sort of things i may not undertsnad cause of my autism and learning disability and cause my brain is behind developmentaly it also afects my physical and emotionaly maturity. when i was a teenager i couldnt watch anything that was for my age only younger than me or i wouldnt understand it and also may get upset even if its related to a special interest.
when Harry potter and the order of the phoenix came out it had older people than the dvelopmental stage i was at i was the equivalent of a 10 or 12 year old and not behaving like a teenager at all and more like a child and mind wasnt mature enough. i didnt find anything happy or sad i just didnt understand it cause it was too mature so i got upset so I had to wait until i was older. i still had to set boundarys 2 years ago and say it has to be 12 plus or pg and no older. its only this year iv been able to watch things that are abit older but when i was on holiday this year cause im interested in mysterys aswell as another factor being involved also i did say yes to what dad wanted to watch with me with this one he wanted to watch A crime documentary. which led me to become interested in criminology.
but alot of interests develop independantly of my family or anyone else also though. most of them do and usualy more influenced by circunstances or self growth or other interests amoung other factors.
an example of circunstances would be that i didnt develop a proper interest and fully develop a speacial interest in Autism and teach people about it until i was 14 when I was 14 the teacher told my class they have autism and taught them about it. i was 10 when i was told i have autism and everything else but it wasnt until I was 14 i became interested in it proper
the lgbtq thing i didnt know it existed until how i discovered i was and came out as it and did research i actualy dveloped an interest i never had to begin with until i came across it for the first time the year it came out.
something i wondered weather you might find interesting with one of the people i told in 2020 they genuinly didnt know what transgender was or know what any other terms for romantic or sexual orientation until i came out as such and tuaght them about it to help them undertsand it and it caused them to question theres and wonder if they might be transgender or not or a different orientation like say bisexual and not gay and gay was the only term they heaard lgbtq wise. they usualy heard it used in slang or jokes so that was where they got it from and eventualy came out as a different orientation to me and actualy thanked me this was during lockdown.
another thing that impacted people from me coming out as transgender was that the care home said that no one has come out as transgender in the care home before so they dont have any training for it. it wasnt until some time after i came out as transgender the manager realised they didnt have one and asked for there to be training on lgbtq and transgender. a staff member came up to talk to me at the care home and told me that the manager said this was missing. if i didnt come out as transgender they wouldnt of known they didnt have one and wouldnt of thought about it probably. and cause i came out as transgender staff needed to learn about it cause new staff didnt know about it and wondered if i could teach them about it so that they have a better understanding of it I was still asked to do this even this year. unfortunatly there finding there training boring and repetative. when I was thinking of hormone therapy and i found a documentary on it and that it goes through absoloutly everything including how it afects relationships they said if i showed the manager they could maybe use it in the training i didnt ever get round to doing that though cause i was too pre ocupied. they still asked me if i could do that into this year when they got more new staff again like they did last year and the year before that