Is it okay to feel this way?

I used to feel like you but I’ve changed. I was diagnosed when I was 21 and once I got my diagnosis everything made sense in life why I felt different and so on. I spent most of my life being told I had moderate learning difficulties but I really started to question that as I have always been intelligent. But I was held back in school in STF units not being pushed enough and so on. Got diagnosed with depression when I was 19 because I had enough of my life. When I got diagnosed I felt relieved but then I got very angry especially towards my parents and gave them a load of abuse. The specialists warned then about that and yeah I’m not proud of that but luckily help was offered. I went through a phase of wanting to be normal I felt cursed and I hated being on the spectrum. I couldn’t keep a stable job or anything. After an amount of time I found work with the nhs who look after their staff and really saw potential in me. I met other people like me including a friend of mine diagnosed in their 40s spent time inside not a bad person just messed up like I was until diagnosed. Then after a while I took the plunge went back to college got some qualifications and then university never got my full degree but I’ve got a level 5 in health and care of children and young people and I have got a job with a teaching agency to work as a teaching assistant in primary schools. I am also learning to be a fire performer and a very close friend of mine Rikki who is also on the spectrum is also helping me see my potential. I am in my 30s now have my own house and a dog and I’m proud of who I am and what I have achieved in life. After my rant and in answer to your question I’m happy to be me. 

That is such an inspiring story Rach - thank you for sharing it. I’m so happy you’ve turned things around and are much happier now :) 

That is such an inspiring story Rach - thank you for sharing it. I’m so happy you’ve turned things around and are much happier now :)