Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi
I had nowhere else to turn to and thought this might be the best place to talk to people.
So just like everyone, I couldn’t decide what to do with my life. After I left school I did 1 year of hairdressing before doing 3 years of Childcare (Level 2 & 3). Then in one week I finished college, had an interview, got the job and started that job in the same week…well I had a full meltdown to my mum on the phone and never went back to my nursery job.
Fast forward 9 years I have been diagnosed with Autism in 2017 (and found out I have had it all my life - which explains a lot of things). And I haven’t had a job or anything in those 9 years.
Well I’m coming up to 30 years old in November and I wanted to try and do something. I passed my driving test last November and I got my first ever car on mobility just over a week ago.
I thought I would try working with animals as I am a HUGE animal lover! And Chester Zoo put up an Apprenticeship for a Zoo Keeper - Which is my dream job!
Well yesterday me and my mum did a test drive to Chester Zoo and it just went badly. I had two people beep their horns at me, I didn’t enjoy my time at Chester Zoo because I knew I would have to drive home soon and then when it was time to come home I missed my turning and ended up going down lanes etc just to reroute. When I got home yesterday I was left very anxious and completely drained - So I sent an email saying I won’t be attending the interview
Myself, My Parents and some family friends think I might of jumped in too soon with getting a job/apprenticeship so far away. There are hardly any animal jobs were I live unfortunately . So I said to my mum “at this rate I will be going back to childcare”.
(Sorry for the long unnecessary backstory on how I ended up here )
ANYWAY, Since I’m autistic I thought maybe I could try and become a SEND TA. When I did my work experience during my course I always clicked with the children especially children with Special Educational Needs.
But I am in a TA group on FB and they are saying how low the pay is that some have to get a second job. I just don’t know what to do with my life, I just would like to be like everyone else and have a job and be proud of it. And to be comfortable in my job too. But I’m lost, and I hate myself because I’m a disappointed on what happened yesterday. I just want to be happy and show I can do things .
What do I do?
Firstly, it's good that you're trying different things. I can understand the dilemma that you're in.
You've probably done this already, but really going through the possible options in detail and trusting your gut feeling is something I think would help.
I say that as someone who is fairly clear of the area he wants to go in (media), and I imagine the sort of thing I want to do, but it's complex. I've just been going through all of my professional contacts and hoping that something comes up.