Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi fellow men. PS (ladies you can chime in if you wish to add anything too) open to all.
I wanted to get a bit of understanding from the men out there. What do you think about being a man with autism? Is it hard? What support do you get? What do you struggle with? For example aggression, anger management, exclusion, social isolation etc.
What do you wish people understood more about being a man? What is being a man to you? What values create a man?
I personally have certain values I will list here:
- treat women with respect and kindness. I believe women deserve to be treated with respect. I always hold doors open for women and let women go first on the bus etc. Just common decency to me but just little things that make me me.
- doing what I believe to be right. I try and follow my heart and do what I know or feel is the right thing to do in the moment.
- patience. Being patient and taking my time with things. Not rushing into the first thing that comes my way but rather instead taking my time and letting things take they’re natural order.
- no tolerance for drugs. Having the inner strength to say no to drugs and being willing to set those boundaries with those I meet through my everyday travels.
- self control. Having the ability to control my self and not act on the first impulse that I feel. Having the self control to stop myself from making daft decisions (ties into next point below).
- maturity. Having wisdom in years and experience to set an example to younger folks of how to treat others and be in the world.
So yeh this was just some ideas, just a fun topic nothing serious. Feel free to share your own values and experiences of being a man.
An interesting discussion, about things in the past, about which traditionally, even thinking about let alone discussing, was actively discouraged and was seen as taboo in previous generations - given my years within the gay community there is still a discussion about masculinity, the whole “masc for masc” and toxic masculinity thing and within the gay community we see hyper masculinity - I’ve always believed that we as gay people have many similarities with autism and vice versa, so I find it very strange that there is such a lack of understanding about autism within the gay community and why prejudice and discrimination within the gay community is so rampant, including but not limited to, about autism related issues
IrishInManchesterUK said:I find it very strange that there is such a lack of understanding about autism within the gay community and why prejudice and discrimination within the gay community is so rampant
I see two factors at play here:
1 - the gay community have such a big job to get accepted that they tend to become a "single issue" group and lack bandwidth for other causes.
2 - there is an element of the abused becoming the abusers (not literally though) - and having spent so long being treated badly then there is a lack of tolerance for othe issues (not actual abuse so perhaps neglect is a better term).
The gay community has had a heck of a lot to deal with and still has so I'm not surprised that this is where the focus remains.