Published on 12, July, 2020
I asked this question elsewhere else recently but I thought I’d ask here too as I’m curious.
I got into a bit of an argument with a friend recently due to a misunderstanding between ourselves. We were talking about something personal and then a couple of days later she messaged me to say that I made her feel bad because I apparently got “defensive” as we were talking.
I was really confused by this because I didn’t think I *was* being defensive (still don’t) but obviously that’s how I came across to her. Anyway, it got me wondering if this was an autistic thing and apparently it is. I read a blog post from an autistic woman saying how our facial expressions and tone of voice can be mismatched with our real feelings, so in a NT orientated world we are often misunderstood based on these things alone. It would explain why so many autistic get accused of being “rude” when they aren’t.
Has anyone else experienced anything like this?
i always get offended people calling me defensive.... but the thing is, being called defensive isnt bad.... if you are defensive that means the other person was infact the offensive one.... as to be on defence means the other side is on offence... so they was being offensive.... you see, its ok to be defensive... but if your defensive it means that they are offensive. now which is worse, being the one that is defensive or being the one that is offensive?
Oh I see what you're saying. So, when someone calls you out for being defensive, it is, in fact, the offensiveness of their defensiveness that is the offensive defensive determiner of whom offended, and defended, whom. As if you offend someone, then defend the offended defender, the offensive defensiveness is related to the defensive offensiveness. Good, glad we've cleared that up!