Am I or aren't I

Hi Everyone. My son was recently diagnosed with Autism. If I'm honest, I was relieved as it explained his behaviour over the last couple of years.

This was then followed by guilt as why didn't we pick up on things earlier. Especially as he may be dyslexic too. 

This leads me to my question. 

For years my wife has laughed at my odd ways, often saying that I am on the spectrum. I even used to tell my wife not to worry about my son as "I was the same when I was a kid".

Since my sons diagnosis, my wife has been reading everything she can and she shows me some things. It would seem that I have a lot of traits too.

I watched a video on the NHS website and tears streamed down my face. I saw parts of me in all of the 5 people in the video. It was as if it was the first time that everything seemed clear in my head and I could explain past experiences.

I decided to ask the doctor for a referral for an autism assessment.

I was firstly told by the receptionist that " I think were all on the spectrum"

Then when the doctor called back I was told that I've coped till now and there's no treatment. I tried to explain that even if I could explain the ways I think and feel and ccould be there for my son as someone who knows exactly how he feels.

He begrudgingly agreed to the referral. But since that call I just feel like a fraud. As if I'm making autism fit to my story. 

I didn't really get my point across to well and normally I would have my wife there so she can explain things as I forget when I'm in these situations.

I just feel very anxious now as it feels that if I was autistic then it would explain so much, but if I wasn't then what?( I have little to no empathy and can be very blunt)

Sorry for the long post. I had to edit as my wife said I may have offended. Apologies. Just being blunt I suppose.