Fear of being left out

I have, in the past, done some meetups with friends in the past. Often, there has been a few rather than just the two of us.

The one thing I didn't get across to people as clearly as I should have, is that I have no issues with people bringing along someone as a support figure, especially if that's something they really benefit from.

However, I think my fear of being left out overwhelms things. Made worse by the fact I never really talk about it. I don't really know how to without sounding like a stroppy teenager. I feel bad because the other person's comfort and safety should trump everything. 

I met up with a friend who brought along a friend of theirs who I didn't know. They were nice, although I felt the dynamic between the two of them was more natural than mine and my friend's, but that may have just been my interpretation. I think we generally did struggle for things to talk about, however. 

It wasn't as bad as me having "tagged along" in the way that I had when I was younger, as that was much more uncomfortable, but I think it's a difficult one to navigate.

I'm guilty of trying to organise meetups and instead of keeping it to a small circle, inviting people I might have only ever interacted with briefly on Twitter. One friend thankfully called me out on that, being like "I'm coming to see you, not some stranger".

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