What am I supposed to do?

Mate - sorry to hear that you are feeling things are difficult at the moment.

Life is hard.....and at the moment, the general "vibe" of people I encounter is pretty negative, depressed and scared.  Don't underestimate how much this "vibe" can compound your domestic struggles.  It isn't necessarily that you are struggling with what you have in your micro-environment around you, it could be that the "bigger picture" is starting to impact you too.  I get this a fair bit....I have to be careful to separate out my thoughts quite carefully to prevent overwhelm.

Also, I am pretty certain that those who do drink, smoke and toke have AT LEAST an equal burden to carry.  If these things do alleviate short-term stresses, in the medium term they generate their own aggravations quite quickly....and in the long term, they CERTAINLY can cause real and serious problems.  Defo not the solution mate....in my humble opinion and experience.

Don't panic !!

There is a good chance that the problem is not with you and Hope mate......its the rest of them !!!!!!!!

Please find yourself some banging and happy tunes from that extensive collection of yours today....and rock-out live a diva.

Very best wishes for a happy day.

Can you watch tv on a mobile device while doing chores?  I put headphones on and put my iPad in a stationary position in the kitchen.   Then I get absorbed in the film or programme while preparing food or cleaning.  
I overthink.  I hyperfocus cleaning or any other superficial thing beyond need.  I use the visual distraction of tv to reduce the hyper effect of the visual disturbance involved in the mess.  This hyper negative reaction is probably due to sensitivity issues in autism.

i use noise cancelling headphones for hoovering. 

executive function issue?   Autism needs different tricks. 
allow minimum work to start with.

do one millisecond of housework. 

I consciously say to myself ‘I will only do one second of the dreaded task’. 

I have to have that as my private way in to motivation. 

Seconding this.

Yeah, I have no idea how people can have a sparkling clean home, unless they are obsessed about cleaning, in which my mind doesn't work that way. I've looked up cleaning and organizing videos, and I've even played games like that, but it's still hard to maintain the house. 

If you want to relax, you should relax for awhile. I mean housework will always be there for you when you return, but your mental and physical health comes first. If you're too tired or burned out, then just take a break, and return to it after. Sometimes even writing the chores down to do later is helpful. 

As a smoker, I can tell you that you shouldn't feel jealous of people who smoke. It's a myth that it helps to calm nerves. Well, it is if it's just tobacco being smoked. It's a habit/addiction, and a horrible one at that.

Whilst I don't use Zoom and also don't have a cat, I can relate to difficulties managing housework.

I hear you. I hate mess and yet I rarely have the energy to tidy so much of my house is a mess.

Sometimes I think my cat judges me about it.