Published on 12, July, 2020
sorry if im making this post wrong. i dont know how to navigate the site very well. im also sorry if any of this comes off as insensitive, please correct me if it is. i just don't know what to do.
my brother and i are twins, older than 20, our parents are nearing their 60s and i'm terrified that they'll slip in his pee and end up seriously hurt.
he's not interested in learning to communicate, to wear clothes on his own, etc. the only piece of sign language he's cared about is "more," which he only uses when asked if he's hungry.
he pees on the bathroom floor, on his bedroom floor, on his bed, on our parents bed, on their bedroom floor, in the hallway, in the kitchen floor, on piles of his clothes, towels, everyone's laundry. the only reason he doesnt pee in my room is because its locked all the time. there's no pattern except that he pees. everywhere. on our beautiful hardwood, on carpet, etc.
he knows to poo in the toilet, thank god, and does actually make an effort to pee there too when my parents take his devices away for peeing on the floor. but when he gets his things back he just goes and does it again. theyve given him buckets to pee in too and even that doesnt help. they remind him to go in the potty every 30 minutes.
(it may be important to add that when he pees, he doesnt know to just pee. he has to, uh, self pleasure before he can. i have to wonder if peeing everywhere has become pleasurable by way of association? like hes pavlovd himself into being that way?)
it doesnt matter what we tell him, it doesnt change. the floors are rotting out. the stress over it is rotting our relationships. i'm trying to convince my parents that he needs to go stay in some kind of residential facility or something, but i don't think they'll listen. what on earth could we possibly do to get him to stop?!?
I guess men will be men. I don’t know but men generally like to pee everywhere I guess it might be different for your brother if he’s autistic maybe he lacks the social sense to control his male urges. I don’t see the point in sending him away maybe just give somewhere he can pee so he doesn’t do it on the floor and stuff. It’s a difficult one hopefully you can find a resolution.
Yellow tree 118 said:men generally like to pee everywhere
Men are weird lol. Why exactly is it a male urge to pee everywhere?
Yeah I cant say I’ve ever seen my husband pee anywhere other than a toilet and he is also ND if that matters.
OP- a lot of the advice about this kind of issue is tailored to preschool aged kids but maybe there are some similarities like attention seeking and not caring what kind of attention that is. Or reaction to a life change. I understand it may be challenging but are you able to get him to a doctor or get a sample to rule out UTI etc. UTIs are quite painful whilst peeing and in between as well, whilst also making it feel like you need to go when you don’t. He may be trying to reduce that discomfort by replacing it with a more pleasurable sensation?