Published on 12, July, 2020
(from a discussion I joined in Reddit)
I have been noticing a trend of people who claim that autism is not an disability, I think there were even some people who were asking to remove it from the classification. Do these people not realise the harm they are making to other autistic people, and themselves, just because they have a prejudice against the "disability" designation?
Last year I got my ASD diagnosis, after my social life was ruined by burnouts and horrible blunders.
It is taking all that is in me to admit to myself that I can not do certain things, it is taking all that it is in my self to cope that can not fight my social awkwardness and that this is the only way I can keep socialising with the people. In the best case scenario I end up looking like the "weird one" or the "clown friend" again, it is taking all in me to accept that I have this disability and that I need some accessibility for things.
And yet people keep working to feed this prejudice that many of us have to work against in ourselves.
Every time that I feel I can not express the way I feel or think, it honestly feels like my body is a trap sometimes.
I cannot read body language and vocal cues. Dogs can. I am less functional than a goddamn dog. That's not the fault of society for not being accommodating enough.
I cannot drive at night, bright lights give me an headache and trigger a meltdown. That's not the fault of society for not being accommodating enough.
I cannot stand loud TV or radio. Everybody else can. That's not the fault of society for not being accommodating enough.
I cannot read a map or find my way around an unfamiliar place. That's not the fault of society for not being accommodating enough.
I have poor fine motor control skills. That's not the fault of society for not being accommodating enough.
Something *is* wrong with my brain. I *am* disabled. I need accommodations to function comfortably, and that's okay. It's nothing to be ashamed of because it's not my fault. I did no wrong; I just have a brain that didn't develop correctly. We need to get rid of "AuTiSM Iz MaGiKaL SupErPoWeR". It is not. It's an horrible disability, and my only hope is that someday there will be a way to prevent it.
To be honest, I think that those people saying that ASD is not a disability are either subscribing to the social theory of disability (total lunacy), deluded, or they have such a mild form of ASD that ASD is not a disability for them. I call them the "TikTok autistics"!
The more high achieving autistics have always led the conversation in the Autistic community. It might just be a difference for them but they should stop thinking of themselves and start thinking of their own community. They also seem to think that everyone with ASD should be in the workplace. So they're embraced by politcians and business because that's what politicians and business want to hear.
This is what I think whenever I watch autistic influencers on YouTube or TikTok. As they fluently deliver their anecdotes about their partners and children and travelling the world and speaking at public engagements.
Maybe they struggle in ways I can’t see but their lives look pretty good to me.
Amerantin (former member) said:Maybe they struggle in ways I can’t see but their lives look pretty good to me.
That's exactly what's happening.
To give you some insight fron my own personal experience: I have a full time job and a long-term partner, and my autism assessment report described me as 'articulate and imaginative'. So exactly the kind of person you're thinking of.
But what that description of myself didn't include is what came next in that report: the recognition that this articulate, storytelling, successful woman is a persona and that maintaining it comes at great personal cost to me, because of all the masking I did to get to where I am now. I also can't cook for myself, or drive, or keep my home tidy. I can't go to the supermarket because the sensory experience is physically painful. I have to work at home because when I had a daily commute I was also having daily meltdowns.
So yes, autistic people who seem to have pretty good lives probably ARE struggling in ways you can't see.
At least they're not struggling alone.