Published on 12, July, 2020
There are going to be a lot of questions here so sorry in advance if these questions are already answered elsewhere. If you could point me to them that would be really help you thanks.
So some background. I have just graduated from university with a degree in Maths where I got a really good grade. I thought that if I focused on doing my degree well then that would be enough people would hire me because of that but it appears that my degree really didn't matter what I should have been doing is focusing getting internships, work experience and doing projects. It wasn't till after I had completed my degree that I realised I could be autistic there some red flags like the fact that I hadn't talked to anyone in my final two years of uni but it didn't click until after I have graduated. I am in the process of getting diagnosis but I have read that takes a long time to actually do. My strengths are I am very good at completing clear written assignments I have been given, I got 100% in the majority of my university assignments. I am very good at solving problems similar to ones that I have seen before, I ended up with getting at or above 70% in all of my university modules. If I am given a deadline to learn something I can. I enjoy learning things especially how to learn, which is probably one of the main reasons I did so well in uni, I created a structure for myself so I could do well. I also have the weird ability to sometimes understand there is a mistake in my work if I understand what is going on. Everything is interesting to me, I could become a software developer, data analyst or go into cyber security but I have trouble with talking to people so I think software development would probably be the best but I will still need to talk to people in it. The problem is what I want to do is constantly switching every five minutes so it is hard to just pick one and learn the skills I need to get a job because it seems employers want you to already be able to do the job before they hire you which I understand but also that does not help me much. I am also having trouble with figuring out the requirements to actually get the job because it hard to know what I need to be learning. I am also worried about ChatGPT and that will take away most of the entry level programming jobs given enough time so is it even worth still learning programming or should I focus on learning something else. I am not really bothered by what job I get, I like the book "So good they can't ignore you" by Cal Newport which says you should focus on doing things well rather then following your passion. At the end of the day if you can do something well you will eventually enjoy it given enough time but companies seem to think differently they want you to be passionate about the job rather then saying I will do it well anyway.
Sorry for the long ramble, as you can imagine I haven't really talked to people in a while and I don't really like asking for help but I figure if I want to live a good life then I am going to need to ask for help. So some questions for you.
How do I become a software developer? - I know I need to learn a programming language, I know Python and I would say I am a competent beginner I am able to complete tasks I have been given as I look up what I don't know but I don't know how to bridge the gap to intermediate programming which I think I need to use projects for but the problem is I have trouble coming up with project ideas and then actually finishing the project. I probably just need to find ways to trick myself into doing it. I think I also need to learn Data Structures and algorithms but I am not exactly sure what I need to learn and how. I also need to have experience with git and github, so I can host my projects and showcase them. What sort of level should my projects be at before I start applying because I have a tendency to I either over do something or under do something there is no middle ground. Should I focus just on development or should I focus on development in a specific area? E.g Embedded software development seems extremely interesting to me but I have a maths degree not an electrical engineering degree so I am not sure how I would get started learning what I needed to learn. How much time should I expect it to take to learn what I need to learn? I read somewhere that in order to get a job being a developer you need to already see yourself as a software developer. Does that make sense? Is it also even possible to become an embedded software engineer with a maths degree and how do I showcase my skills? Should I focus on learning the skills and look for jobs where they ask for those skills and can showcase in projects that I actually have those skills. I have trouble getting started doing things and not getting distracted when I am doing it. I imagine breaking a problem down into solvable parts is helpful but the problem is actually doing them.
How do I get a part-time job whilst I upskill? I don't have any work experience as I kept putting it off and off until eventually my degree finished and I have no work experience. I don't really have much to put on my CV as the only thing I have really done is worked on my degree and done nothing else. Does it matter? How do I even do an interview? Why do you want this job? Because I want a job not really the best answer. What sort of part-time work should I look into doing, as I imagine customer service is just going to go badly? I honestly have no idea.
Most of the resources out there seem tailored to people with a diagnosis, which I understand why, but are there any resources tailored to undiagnosed people?
How do I get social skills, as currently my social skills are at 0 and I don't know how to move the marker? How do I actually make friends? There is a lot of general information out there but not much specific information.
Sorry for all of the questions, there are probably answers out there already to all of them, the problem is I just don't where and what exactly is relevant to me. There is both too much information and not enough information. So I figured I should just ask them all in one place. There are probably more questions that I just haven't though of yet but these should be the main ones. Sorry, if anything I say is rude, I tend to either get stuck in my own head for days overthinking problems or just blurt out a response where I come across as rude but I don't know how to fix this. I am new to all of this and am trying to figure everything out.
Thank you to anyone who answers. Thank you for your time and I hope you have a great day.
thats the thing isnt it.... we cant tell you how, it just happens naturally like magic to everyone else.but yet its the only thing society runs off, it determines you getting a job, keeping a job, being promoted, recieving rewards..... all of this is based on connections and social skill... if your the hardest best worker and can do the best job and are most qualified none of that matters as society is based on your social connections instead of your merit.and we cant get social connections, it doesnt work for us. this isnt a society for us.
I am sorry, but I think you are wrong. Anything can be learnt if you are willing to put in the effort. There is no use complaining about things. The only thing you have control over is your actions, so if takes learning social skills to make a difference then you have just go to learn social skills. You can't control what other people do but you can control what you do. Maybe I will fail again and again, but at least I tried. Opportunity comes to those who are prepared for it, so you just need to prepare, that means going out and looking foolish, making mistakes and picking yourself up. Maybe I am wrong but it is my understanding masking is where you go about trying to hide who you are, trying to fit in but I don't think that is the only way, there must be a way to work with our minds to make it easier to learn social skills, going with the grain instead of against. How do you know if you are the best worker or can do the best job if you don't look up from your hole and see what other people are doing. I imagine there are thousands of different people with thousands of different ways of solving problems, that you can only find by talking to people. If this society isn't for us, then we will just have to change that. Step by step. Sorry, I don't know what you have gone through, maybe you just disagree with me, that is ok, but I am going to be an optimist, have hope, do my part to help the people that need helping when they need it the most and that comes from developing social skills and connections. From making mistakes, putting myself out there and trying. Maybe, I will just fail, maybe you are right but I am going to try.
How do you know if you are the best worker or can do the best job if you don't look up from your hole and see what other people are doing
thats pretty easy.... i see what others are doing, alot of them are walking around doing nothing at all pretending to work, i saw some hiding out behind the bins at night hiding, i see some locking themselves in toilet cubicles for hours which is more annoying as i need the toilet and they are using them to skive off work.... and ofcourse another tell tale sign is i am used to replace 2 people at jobs. and myself on my own does a better job than the 2 people as if you dont do it fast enough it stops, and it never stops with me but it always stops with any 2 people on.... meaning im faster and better than 2 people of which my process leads confirm i at least do the job of 2 people and i shouldnt be hated as much as i am but yeah supervisors and middle management are all in their offices dont know what the workplace is like as they are stuck in their office and dont know their workers propper.i cant control whether someone hates me or not.... and once they hate me and act against me im gonna find it hard to suck up to them like youd perhaps suggest as id not respect them as theyd have alienated me from them. i dunno.... its like.... trying to ask a person who is discriminated against by one person to suck up to them and humiliate themselves for that person, like think of any discrimination case and try imagine the cure being the one discriminated against being to bow down and suck up to the discriminator, it never works...but as for social stuff i can perhaps work on that as you say, by taking up a mixture of courses and education, such as a combination of phycology and acting. then you can know other people and combined with acting you can manipulate them and the situation like a evil genious lol
I am sorry. I am rushing. Trying to make friends. Talking to people is new to me. I am probably making a bunch of mistakes. Saying things I shouldn't. Asking too many questions. Not really thinking. Trying to help people when they don't really want help. I will learn with time. Maybe people won't like me but that is ok, I can't change that, I can just be me. Sorry for my actions I will try to do better. Ask fewer questions, make less assumptions. I have only ever really thought about myself and my experiences. Sorry. I am a bit of a bull in a china shop, acting impulsively and only after things are broken looking back at my actions and then overthinking all of my small mistakes. Making mountains out of mole hills. I need to slow down. Stop sending messages and start again from scratch. I have made a mistake. I want everything to be done now, and that is not ok. Like all things, it takes time make the friendships worth having. I have probably burnt a lot of bridges I have no idea what people think of me which is probably not for the best. Actions have consequences. I should talk to people in person rather then online, I don't think this is the right place for me. I am sorry you had the experiences you have had. No one should have to go through that. You deserve to work at a place that appreciates your work. https://blog.evenbreak.co.uk/tag/coaching/, https://auticon.com/uk/about-us/community-partners/ . As much as I want to be I am not a good person, that's ok, I don't need to be a good person straight away, even god doesn't judge people till the end of their lives. I am going to focus on getting a job and then talking to people, little by little one stop at a time. You are amazing, there will only ever be one of you throughout all of time and space, there will never be anyone like you again, you deserve to have a good life. I wish you the best.
You should consider becoming a log thrower, or baseball player I imagine that could make good use of your skills. Sorry. I would like to learn your story.
work at a parcel company throwing parcels in the warehouse lol
I am sorry to hear that. Have you thought about changing jobs? There are autism related job boards, where you might be able to get more support for your work, or work somewhere where you are appreciated. EvenBreak is one. Have you thought about learning a new skill so you can change your job. I am not talking about sucking up to people, everybody deserves respect even those that you do not agree with. At least that is what I want to believe, you probably think differently. What do you do if you do not mind me asking?