Extreme fear of upsetting people

Hi All,

I seem to get extremely upset when I believe I have upset a friend. This is, luckily, quite rare I think as I am such a massive people pleaser to ensure this doesn't happen. But this weekend, my friend and housemate said that he would be visiting his dads to help him with something around the house. I said I would go along and help if he wanted. The next morning, no time had been set as to when we would leave and my friend was still in bed. I got a text from another friend asking if I wanted to go for a quick coffee. As I hadn't heard what time we would be leaving, I stupidly agreed to go for a coffee. Unfortunately my other friend then left without me as he said he couldn't wait around for me. I phoned him to apologise for not going with him and he put the phone down on me and then ignored me. I sent him a message apologising and I was genuinely really sorry. I thought I could go for a coffee and would be back in time to go to his dads. Normally I wouldn't say anything but I did tell him that him putting the phone down on me upset me. He has said that this made him extremely angry and lonely and that he was looking forward to spending the day with me. He has since been ignoring me, won't talk to me and giving me the silent treatment. He has said that he didn't want to come home.

I am absolutely devastated. I can't stop crying. I had to leave work early yesterday as I just couldn't focus.  I know this is an extreme reaction. Has anyone got any advice on what I can do to further apologise to my friend? I also go through stages of thinking that he is overreacting and not being fair to me, but then I feel like it is just my autism telling me that and that I am not seeing things how others without autism do.