What ways do you have of feeling good?

What things do you do, or have you done, to help you hang on and believe in yourself?

As a kid I just didn’t have an ego at all, I just felt like I was being told what to do by everyone, mocked, used, abused and generally disliked and ignored. Finding a place of complete freedom where I could feel myself just being myself, free of the tethers of mundane existence sort of allowed me to validate myself, see that there was something worth fighting for, because at my best, at my most free I was amazing. It didn’t change things on the ground be it gave me an emotional release which was key to my mental health.

Although it doesn’t change anything on the ground, one my way of doing this, is to get ecstatic experiences in various different ways, that sort of pops me out of the misery for a while, and things seem brighter on return. Stuff I do, or have done is as follows:

Autistic guitar, or other instrument playing, play three or four notes over and over again until I start to feel something then really lean into the same notes to sort of express something, just do it over and over and over again until I feel something, and then when I feel something really focus on that.

Exercise - build it up gradually and gradually until I start to feel something then lean into the emotion and build and build and build until I’m really pumping and sweating and feeling something.

Dancing - alone or at something like 5 Rhythms, which is a bit cultish, but their whole thing is about absolutely getting completely out of you nut and, the best thing is, you literally don’t have to talk to anyone at all, or dance with or near people, so its sort of the best of both world, you get to dance like a complete outsider with the absolute support of everyone else around you, but you have absolutely no obligation, implied or overt to be social.

Mediatation - there are ecstatic practices in Sufism and Osho stuff, or Buddhists get off their heads by focusing and mindfulness. Some schools will repeat a mantra in their heads or out loud for like hours at a time which get you completely blitzed. You do have to put up with the religious bullshit though.

Overtone singing - singing one note for minutes on end, listening for the overtones, doing this with other people, if you like where you can hear this subtle noises that seem to be at one time part of you and at another some kind of weird pattern of sound intelligence.

Normal singing groups - its a real buzz in relaxed groups, you don’t have to read music you just sing with people and don’t have to be in tune, usually its just one or two people who can sing who sort of keep things moving along and in tune, and everyone else just has a good time. The sense of singing in harmony when it comes together is beyond words.

Walking - for me this works best at the moment, I use the rhythm of my walk to sort of move my feelings and thoughts about - I live in London so no one seems to bat an eyelid at me walking quickly or slowly, after an hour or so I seem to really chill out. I do occasionally have to deal with what’s going on in the street or park interacting with me, but I like that random element these days as it seems to help with the process, but it has more feeling of risk than the other things that are done in safe spaces.

I’d be really really interested in the ways other people try to balance the account of positive and negative experiences (though I think we should talk about experiences with drugs in a different thread, because I think that is slightly different) - the things that have helped them hang on in life, and believe in themselves.