Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone!
I want to talk about Autistic Burnout. I have been dealing with Autistic Burnout at different stages of my life, but I've hit a dead end with it and I think advice from others that have had a similar expereince could help me to better regulate my emotions.
I work full-time 42 hours a week. The only way I can earn enough to pay for my home, my car, my family, etc, is through full-time work. As an adult with responsibilities, I can't just "switch off" when I come home, there are chores to do, meals to cook, the dog to walk (FYI I love my dog, its just after an exhausting day of work I sometimes just have no energy). Its become so much that I've been off work for nearly a week on sick leave just so I don't completely lose my marbles (thanks brain).
I can't keep doing this otherwise I'm going to lose my job, which will affect all that I've listed above.
I've been to my doctor and I'm now on medication for anxiety and depression. Hopefully this will help me through my anxious and depressed times. However, I know full well that medication isn't the fix to my autistic burnout. I've been in touch with a number of autism charities in my local area and have appointments booked with them, so I'm making a start, but I would like to know how any of you copes with autism burnout.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I know its long winded, but I feel talking to others that go through the same "turbulence" may help myself and others to understand themselves more. Thanks again!
Hello Winter, I am Number.
To my mind, you are NOT describing burnout above, as I define it and how I have seen most others here define it also.
It sounds to me like you are on the cusp of a mega burnout...........so you need to make some changes QUICK, in my humble opinion !
Loosing your job (with all resultant chaos and pain) is not the worst thing that can happen. Loosing 4-6 years of your life due to my definition of mega/extreme burnout is FAR worse and I sincerely believe that some poor souls literally loose their life due to extreme burnout.
Please rest assured that I am not trying to "mine is bigger than yours" you. I am recovered and back to functionality....but holy carp, I could not have imagined just how 'dead' and 'zombified' I was capable of becoming due to burnout...it literally nearly killed me. From superman to dead-man-walking.....and not for a few weeks, nor few months......but years.
I am guarded on these public pages, so I do not wish to explain precisely how fast and how far I fell, nor from what height, but I can assure you that it quite literally knocked the stuffing out of me when I hit the bottom, and then kept sinking slowly into the quicksand. The burnout (as I define it) becomes evident when you try to metaphorically get up again, but cannot, no matter how much you want to or need to.
I was very lucky for all manner of reasons (mainly support from one of two humans who don't subscribe to the accepted "values" of our modern world. I have recovered and re-emerged wiser and calmer - not as a hippy I hasten to add - still doing what I have always done.
If I had my time over....when I KNEW FULL WELL that my life had become unsustainable (i had at least 5 years warning), I would have walked away - despite the lack of logic that would have displayed to me and everyone else. I didn't appreciate that my downsides of "powering through, like I always have, through the cycles of booming and busting energy and enthusiasm" COULD conceivably have been so dire.
Please take care of yourself Winter. Please listen to your own head and ignore all the nonsense of "but I have no choice but to...." You have choices now - so take a long serious look at them - perhaps within the context of my warning above.
Sorry if this freaks you out - not my intention - I just want to save every autistic soul from the fate that I suffered !
Good luck.
Number.
Hi Number, thank you for sharing. Those years must have been really hard on you.
I'm doing my best to determine what is best for me. I've always found having full time work, and everything else to maintain at home is extremely difficult for me to balance. I've had people tell me to "leave your stress at work, you're not at work now you're at home." but its not as simple as that. I'm unable to just switch off when I'm at home due to my responsibilities. So I'm stuck in a loop of "its either cutting down hours at work, switching off completely at home to keep working the same hours, or some other hidden method that I just haven't grasped".
I'm going to be speaking to some people who have autism in a local charity in my area, to ask them what they are doing or what they have done to minimise or eliminate burnout entirely.
Thank you again for sharing. Take care!