What is ‘Sanctuary’?

Thank you, my friend..

What amazing conversations we have had!

Life is just overwhelming for me at the moment, with one thing or another... 

You’re good person Pegg and you’ve made good here. Wherever you go, whether or not that is away from here, having made-stone of our conversations in their completion, know that you’ve been the rainbow you speak of.
Your statements are and will be the quiet-church you speak of for me, this forum has consolidated thoughts for me, that a professional could never have done with a manual..

That's perfectly, and lyrically, expressed, DeSpereaux - exactly so.

Ah! But that's Sanctuary the Metaphysical! As in a sense this forum also is...

Sanctuary the Physical we might discover in random, unexpected places - in a rainbow, or a snowy hillside, or a quiet, old building... 

Or we might make it for ourselves, out of memories and comforts... 

Incidentally, I was on my way out of here until you started this irresistible thread... hmm..

Thanks for the clarification and contrast guys, it’s easy-enough to allow passage of the reverberations of past-chaos, to darken my thoughts and dull my peace. It was my pretext, in writing this discussion, that sanctuary was the illusion of stone and validation.
It was my point that it was inevitable that the stone was destined to be sand running through a firm-grip, and that validation was little-more than sown-wind waiting to be reaped, but it’s hard to see a pretext for what it is by one’s self..

Damn,and i thought it was just me !
I live in my Bedroom.
My World, my safe place.
It has the gravitational pull of a black hole.
I can't escape it.

I love that Pegg, sanctuary then is validation, sanctuary starts at the moment of admission into a place that arrests you of your burdens, even if temporary.

Sanctuary is the moment of authentication, the beep of a train-ticket at a barrier, that tells you that you need not worry again until you reach your destination..

No you’re doing it very-appealingly actually, sanctuary is stone, and it is non-reactive.. I like what you’ve said it’s soothing, and I believe I shall read in again, when aggravation shrouds me next..

Debbie you have articulated very well my own thoughts. I will add - it's where and with who we can be ourselves.

I think the notions are not just physical place but in our head as well.

DeSpereaux said:

Also what resources can an autist consider reliable and effective? Because to me it is not to be found in the upper-echelons of professional practice, nor can it be found reliably in operational service-provision, to me it has only been found amongst this forum and within my own skill-and-interest.

The advantage of this forum is that its members are often coming from a similar place and/or perspective - you are likely to find empathy here, and empathy can lead to validation, which we all benefit from as humans.

In an NT-dominated world, empathy and validation can be painfully lacking, as I'm sure most of us have experienced at some point. 

Perhaps then, this forum can be - indeed is - a sanctuary to its people. 

Beyond the basic and generic requirements of life, like a safe and secure place to live, an environment you can control to an acceptable extent, sufficient means to live - which are the foundations on which the rest rests - 

Sanctuary can potentially be found in people (astonishing but occasionally true) and animals, interests and ideas...

If it is to have a single defining characteristic, then Sanctuary is the sense of peace, security and serenity that allows you to be, and more fully become, yourself. 

That's it, I think...

Pegg.

Sanctuary for me is my room.

It's like my place my world.

No one can get in and spoil it for me and it's there when I need to escape everything else.

DeSpereaux said:

We deserve to carve out a sanctuary, and have respite from the world, as neurotypicals do in their own ways.

Thank you for this thread.

The above words of yours I have quoted really resonated for me.

So, what is sanctuary just for us autistic people, not a general question?

Well, some things I think will be universal and some individual, but common.

I should think a peaceful place to live would be fairly common amongst us.

For myself, an aspect of sanctuary is the ability of have a place to go where everything I need is available, especially silence.

Generally, safety is very important, feeling and being safe, from harm, from others, from noise, intrusion, violence, threats etc etc.

A home can very much be a sanctuary and that should include security.

Security within the home and security of possession.

Sanctuary also means to me a place free from change unless it's a change I can initiate and control.

Personal control, then, generally, is a place of sanctuary for me.  Freedom from chaos and the manipulation of people.

I am finding it hard to put this just into an autistic context actually.

It's a super question and I must come back to it when I'm less distracted.

There’s even a point to consider whether a responsibility can be considered a sanctuary, owing to the doleful-weight of threats to their stability.

Can you consider something, that you can be so catastrophic and invested in, a sanctuary? Does a sanctuary have to be a dispassionate and institutional in nature?

This is just a reflection, regarding the point that I am at in my cycle, as I map the desert I am in, I am quantifying just how sparse the landscape is now that the novelty is reduced.

I’m realising that if I want it to be more varied, I will have to build on it myself, and in ways that I have not imagined yet..

One of the ways to figure out where we fit in the world, even with the positive-aspects which an autist lives with, is the ability to abjure ourselves of the unhealthy-and-harmful aspects of the world which we live too.

This is not a neurotypical world, for we are in it too albeit in smaller number, we retain the right to ward-off and overcome the more-harmful aspects of this world. We deserve to carve out a sanctuary, and have respite from the world, as neurotypicals do in their own ways.