Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone :)
I have a question to ask and you might think it is silly.
I understand and can identify with 90% of what is posted on this forum but something keeps tripping me up. I don't **really know** what people mean when they say they had a 'meltdown'.
I can only assume that I do not get these? I am on a lot of medication that makes it hard to really feel any feelings, so maybe I am just too numb to experience this.
Anyway, if anyone can share their experience of what happens/means when someone talks about meltdowns that would be helpful.
(Is it the same as if, for example, you said a child was having a meltdown? eg. throwing a tantrum)
Thanks in advance and sorry if this is a stupid/obvious question.
My meltdowns are a complete loss of control of my own behaviour, I will try to calm down by taking myself to a quiet place where I can be alone, I will rock, or scream in to a pillow, if I am am really distressed I hurt myself to get rid of all of that energy. Then I normally get really tied and need to sleep. Meltdowns happen when I’m overwhelmed. I’m really interested if you are happy to say, what kind of medication you are on? I would love to find something that prevented meltdowns, unless you don’t have them anyway regardless of meds I guess it’s hard to know?
Hey Chloe, thanks for your response!
Interesting that you and the poster above you mentioned hurting yourselves.
While I have not experienced these kinds of meltdowns (not as an adult anyway) I do have a long history of self harm and attempts on my own life. So maybe I am taking all that anger and bad energy and just reflecting it inwards, against myself, rather than letting it out in these screaming and crying kinds of ways? For what it's worth, I think the meltdown behaviour sounds a lot more healthy than my thing.
I take a few medicines but the one that has really made me go quite 'numb' is Risperidone. It's an antipsychotic. I don't recommend taking it if you don't need it though.