Published on 12, July, 2020
This is quite embarrassing to write but I'm going to do it anyway. Okay - this might just be a 'me' thing - if that's the case please just ignore this post but:
Why is getting washed and/or clean so hard?
I don't know if it is an autistic thing but getting in the shower/changing clothes/changing bedding and doing laundry is so hard for me. I am an independent adult I should be able to function better. :(
I just had a shower and washed my hair for the first time in X weeks (too ashamed to say). I feel better now and I smell nice, so why don't I manage to do it more often?
I live alone and rarely go out or see people, so my lack of washing isn't bothering anyone. I wanted to ask my weekly cleaner to help me change my sheets but I am too ashamed for her to see the state of my bed so its something I will have to tackle alone.
Anyway, if anyone can relate please comment below, or if you just want to tell me I'm being a big baby that's also fine.
Hi, I think building a routine could help! And before you know it it might go from one extreme to the other and you might desperately need that daily shower. When I was younger and at school, I really hated washing and having a shower. My mum could barely get me to have a bath once a week (after horse riding). I don't know why but I just didn't like it. Then it all changed (I think it was triggered by a comment from someone) and I ended up having a bath/shower every morning and I really needed this to function and it became part of my routine. I think it's a matter of building up a routine. I also find that when I feel bad about myself and am filled with self-hate, I tend to self-neglect more as I feel like I don't deserve to feel good. Not sure if something like this could be going on for you as well.
Both my sons are autistic - but one is scrupulous about washing and showering etc and the other just hates it completely and never wants to engage with it at all. So different, and yet both are at the extreme ends of the washing spectrum! I think there are some good ideas in this thread about making it a bit more tolerable. One thing that helps me is having really lovely scented shower gels etc so that I can enjoy that aspect of it. And fluffy towels and favourite soft nightwear and cosy socks ready to put on afterwards. I hate cleaning my teeth so much that often it delays me going to bed til later than is ideal. So I’ll have my audiobook ready to go when it’s done so I can motivate myself with that. I don’t know why they don’t invent nicer flavours of toothpaste because I just hate all those mint flavours. Horrible.
There are fruit flavours, maybe only for kids? And I once tried fennel toothpaste but found it vile because it was far too frothy, but that was years ago so no idea if that is still even made. I like mint, but I cannot stand frothy.