Published on 12, July, 2020
Currently I am struggling, probably going through a shutdown as people have noticed I’ve become withdrawn.
The cause of this is my employers, it has left me no choice but to look for another job. My manager changes my rota without asking which disturbs my routine, I am told I will never progress for promotion where I am due to my health issues although I haven’t asked for any workplace adjustments. I don’t get regular lunchtimes. When I confided in a senior at the company, he said “everyones a little autistic”.(I am a adult late diagnosed, whilst working for this company, HR never came to speak to me about it post diagnosis, pre diagnosis the HR Director said “autism is very common these days”).
I am told I should learn to adapt my autism to the work environment by a senior staff. By nature I am an introvert, and keep on getting told I need to be more outgoing and louder. As an employee my work is spot on they have no complaints I’m meticulous but I lack hitting the targets marginally and thats why I keep on getting threatened to be put on reviews, this induces anxiety and fear of losing my job. I work in a bright, noisy environment and have a customer facing job, I mask highly to get on with it, I am good at what I do, money is not the motivator, we are commission based with a basic salary. My motivation is the product I sell, its one of my special interests.
Are there other autistics who have been dealing with discrimination, bullying, underestimation of intelligence or employers not caring ?
Do you just leave and find elsewhere or challenge their ignorance and lack of training on neurodiversity?
This is good case for why we need to untangle the narrative of "My Autism". It's not mine. It's human.
It's also a good one be begin to explain that we cannot have it both ways: Detail oriented is not Big Picture and they cannot co-exist. Eric Fromm speaks about this a good deal. One of the most overlooked sociologists in history.
I was in a position years ago where I kept explaining that being dyslexic, I cannot work any faster. And while the individual I reported to appeared understanding, the chap above him was not. However, in this hierarchy, I was told my depth of knowledge was such that they were taking notes from! I was informed I was costing them money at my slower pace even though my knowledge was an asset. I just didn't bother to go back the following week.
It's not "my" autism. It's a COMPLETELY different way of receiving and mentally disseminating information which all autistics experience to one intensity or another. Either you appreciate this out-of-the-box difference or you don't, and with it comes strengths and limits.
I would write down and gain clarity for yourself on what you were hired to do, contrast with current expectations. Write down the positives of working with your strengths (introversion) and the negatives of not being mindful of your limits.
Freud originally stated "We're all a little Neurotic". Except we're not, some of us are Autistic (and these are in polarity). It is a Lack of Empathy when your employer states they're also autistic. Clearly they don't understand the Autistic Difference. 3 fundamental values which make us all different are a difference in using language, a different salience network and the monotropic brain. Have a look into these so when you put a case together in context with your job expectations, you'll be able to show how an Autistic person would thrive in this position best. And how they would fail. I would be angry if my employer was purposely setting me up to fail.
JuniperFromGallifrey said:I was in a position years ago where I kept explaining that being dyslexic, I cannot work any faster. And while the individual I reported to appeared understanding, the chap above him was not. However, in this hierarchy, I was told my depth of knowledge was such that they were taking notes from! I was informed I was costing them money at my slower pace even though my knowledge was an asset.
This is exactly where I am, I exceed all other employees in other areas, I find anomalies others can’t see. My ideas and opinions are taken into account by the upper management. Yet my lack of sales is the problem, although it has improved since my diagnosis. This is a company that has nearly 100 people in the same job role I do, dotted across the different stores, and only a fraction are hitting the required target. To me this threat of performance reviews is futile because statistically they should have half the selling staff on it already.
My challenge is if some of my NT counterparts are weak in every area of their role yet still employed how can I be threatened with reviews based on just one area. This is more to do with my characteristics, we have those colleagues who do as they are told, follow orders blindly, right or wrong, and we have me who needs a logical explanation and answers to questions to do things and that itself can be problematic to managers who don’t know the answers in front of others and it makes them feel less authoritative.
Goes back to one of my parents saying to me as a child, “even if you know all the answers in class, don’t put your hand up, nobody likes anyone smarter than them all the time, especially the teacher”
Rosina said:Goes back to one of my parents saying to me as a child, “even if you know all the answers in class, don’t put your hand up, nobody likes anyone smarter than them all the time, especially the teacher”
Oh I wish someone had told me this when I was young.
Is there a position you might be better suited for there? It sounds like you add value in ways often overlooked.