Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi All!
I'm genuinely curious to hear what you think is the positive side of your diagnoses of Autism (or ADHD; or Autism and ADHD together). There's a lot of difficulties online but I'm also really fascinated by how differently we can see the world and the benefits of that.
Here's a couple of examples from me!
I don't get socially awkward very easily when there is clear justification for my actions. As an example, if my partner and I go out to eat and they receive food that they didn't order or doesn't match up to what they ordered (it could be they ordered crispy pizza with pepper and the dough isn't crispy and there are onions instead) they would feel awkward about bringing it to the attention of the server whereas I feel very, very comfortable with doing this (politely of course). The chef has broken the rules, this is not what we paid for and ordered, therefore they should rectify it and we have nothing to be worried about - therefore I don't worry. This also spreads to other social situations too.
I'm also very, very good at making quick connections between things and solving problems. I intuitively seem to find the relationship between things or find answers for problems. As a silly example, we needed to buy a new frying pan online that was the same size as our old one. However, we couldn't find our ruler or tape measure to check the actual measurements. But, I did have a lined A4 notebook. I looked up the standard sizes for the line spacings of the notebook and used the lines to the measure the frying pan which then gave me a very close approximation of the size. This took me mere seconds to come up with.
Please let me know yours!
Ability to see things others can’t - able to interpret and analyse deeply, particularly around my special interests.
Lack of ego - not deterred by criticism; don’t do nice things for praise or compliments.
Accepting - non-judgmental; see the good in everyone; adapt to who I’m with to help them feel comfortable.
(I’m obviously ignoring the downsides of any of these, but this is a post about the positives after all!)
I am deeply affected by people and deterred by them. Does that mean I am not autistic?
No it doesn't. Some of us defo feel as you have explained.
Yes: at work when someone seems to be angry I assume that it’s about me. I even said it to them and they reassured me it was not about me.
Hi NAS73180, I feel like this also. I'm glad I've read the other comments about it and I feel less like an imposter. I seem to be ridiculously sensitive to peoples reactions especially confrontation, even if it's not directed at me. Though it's worse if it is directed at me, as I instantly just stand there and cry if someone has a go at me.
Hi Alex! That makes complete sense. I'm the opposite. I am very effected by other people and praise/criticism can build or break my mood your resilience is really admirable.
Well, autism is a spiky profile and one autistic person can be hyper-sensitive to one thing when another is hypo-sensitive to the same thing (i.e. over responsive or under responsive).
My point on not being affected by others wasn’t that I don’t care about others - I care deeply. And I want to do the right thing by others. It’s more at times of stress if I’m unfairly criticised I can recognise that it’s unfair in the moment and won’t let it affect my self esteem.
On the other hand if someone is trying to lift me up and give me over the top praise, I don’t need it. I know when I’ve done a good job and don’t need external validation, I guess.
Hi NAS73180! I don't think that would mean you're not Autistic. I'm not officially diagnosed but I test with significant Autism traits on lots of the tests on this website - https://embrace-autism.com/autism-tests/I myself am deeply affected by people and tend to take criticism to heart. There are lots of different traits with Autism and you don't have to have all of them. Some of them are also contradictory! I'm not drawn to people in the same way I've seen neurotypical people be and sometimes actively avoid social engagement. So it sounds like you're like me on that front than like Alex.