Published on 12, July, 2020
Thanks to Trisha for inspiring this thread.
These are my answers to her original question (on another thread).
They can be personal, political/history etc.
Here are some of my personal ones.
1976, whilst still at school, meeting a (still) close friend.
1992, when I started to see a psycho/sexual psychologist.
1992, meeting my other close friend.
2007, starting a relationship with my now husband.
2015, when I was able to give up work.
2022, re my autism diagnosis (and joining this forum).
These are life milestones/turning points. Different perhaps from the ones we are meant to consider so.
How about yours?
I'm keeping this more to the positive side, like Debbie's original post, though a few negatives have to be in there. I am missing out some really bad stuff.
Primary School - happy days! Didn't fit in, but had a small group of friends. There was no bullying. Lessons were fun. Happy home life.
Secondary School - a sensory and social nightmare. I went to a really rough school. Kids carried knives. The fact that a 5th former beat up a window cleaner one day shows the kind of level we are talking. I had a spate of being bullied. I learned to mask really fast here. My survival depended on it. I hated the place. I think I attended about 25% of the lessons the entire time. There was a fork in the road here that I think changed the course of my life - an innocuous comment/compliment by an older girl made me make my hair my special interest . I was obsessed with looking like Steve Jansen of the band Japan. Taking care of my appearance and masking paid big dividends - she said to my older brother "Your kid would be alright if he did something with his hair.". I really think that if it wasn't for that comment, my life would be completely different now.
Pre-University - first proper girlfriend. She taught me a lot and we are still in touch to this day. Her daughter is suspected autistic and is on the NHS waiting list. I reckon her partner is autistic because he is so much like me it is unbelievable! Some NTs really do have us as their 'type'
University - made friends (total geeks!) that I am still friends with. Split with my first love after nearly three years, and got together with my second love for six years. That did not end well. She cheated on me and took most of our belongings. During the happy times I got my first post-university job which involved me writing music in an attic by myself five minutes walk from where we lived. Bliss.
The Trance Years - coped with my loss by getting into the Trance scene. Lots of recreational pharmaceuticals that began with 'E' and alcohol. Made new friends on a very shallow level. I even released several records of my own. I must be one of the few people in the world who ended a record label contract rather than the other way around. The attention was way too much for me (obviously my autism in retrospect). I have some regrets about this, but I think, logically, that if I tried to cope it would have involved more drugs and drink, so it was probably for the best that I left this behind.
Third and best love - I had several girlfriends, but I met my future wife through friends of friends. She's the best thing that ever happened to me, and we are still together over twenty years later. Yesterday when she didn't make a fuss about me having to leave her with our nephews when London got too much gives me the warm and fuzzies. I know that I am very lucky.
Autism diagnosis - this year!
Picture: Steve Jansen - my teenage idol and my hair goal it was the 80s
Thank you for sharing.
.Third and best love - I had several girlfriends, but I met my future wife through friends of friends. She's the best thing that ever happened to me, and we are still together over twenty years later. Yesterday when she didn't make a fuss about me having to leave her with our nephews when London got too much gives me the warm and fuzzies. I know that I am very lucky..'