Forum phenomenon I’ve noticed

This isn’t a criticism, just an observation. In fact my heart goes out to those prone to doing it as they seem to be experiencing a particular form of autistic ‘blind-spot’ that may leave them feeling isolated and unheard when really they’ve just been shouting into the dark without realising.

The phenomenon in question: basically someone newish to the forum sensibly browses for threads on topic x rather than start a totally new thread. But as they read through, they hone in on one point made by one user and reply to it, asking a question of them perhaps. In many cases, that user has not been around for quite a while, but the new person seems unaware of this statistical likelihood and Unless one of us points it out they are left like a tree falling in the forest. One of us will maybe spot their comment and help them out by pointing out that no response will ever come. But other times we might just be confused why an old thread has bobbed up to the surface and can’t see the recent comment buried among the old ones. 

I have not practical advice to offer. It just makes me feel a bit wistful and sad for the person with that vulnerability to not factoring in the passage of time. Does anyone get that poignant feeling about it all? It makes me sad. Not just for the ‘ignored’ person but for the many lost ‘ghosts’ who we may one day be sooner than we intended. I miss everyone in advance, all the time. And complacency in this place will never take hold as departures of both kinds recently, (as well as more mayfly forum existences)  will not be the last. I like and appreciate everyone who’s here, even if they’re just quietly sitting ‘at the back’ - all losses are felt keenly. Best wishes to all. 

  • Shardovan, I belong to another forum for another condition I have, and the same thing regularly occurs there -  very old threads brought up by unknowing new members.

    I have seen older members pointing it out to them and suggesting they start a new thread, which does seem the best thing to do; however, the info contained in the old threads is still relavent, but as others here point out, the original posters may well have left the forum.

    So basically 'there's a lot of it about'.

    Ben

  • That's brilliant, Martin.  Slight smile

  • I have a photo of myself and Larkin, a random juxtaposition during a graduation ceremony, though he is definitely looking at me.

  • Some people might prefer it that way. Others being hopeful of a reply that never comes. 

    Very thought provoking post. 

  • It doesn't help there's a stack of "Related" posts to the right side of this thread, and when clicked on the date is in an off-white to light grey. Perhaps once a thread is at least a year old, the Mods could put a LARGE date under the title?

  • Hello Darkness.  I certainly know your namesake !  Please do jump into the threads if you feel you have something to say and feel able to do so.  I find this place a two-way street....you jump in to try and help and support someone, and you unexpectedly get a tap of the shoulder of love and support from the shadows.

    Good to make your acquaintance - I hope to bump into you again soon.

  • I found that very moving to read - Thank YOU

  • No, it’s a lovely thing to see something old revived and given new life. I maybe didn’t make my point as well as I intended, and I’m feeling a bit too zonked to be articulate today. But I agree that’s it’s a positive overall. Very much so. 

  • I love it when this happens - as you describe - because we get to read the thoughts of people who have long since melted into the ether.  On occasion, I have been surprisingly and usefully informed.

  • I don't believe I'm a Boomer at all to be honest, but I suppose it depends from whom's perspective I'm looking at myself from.  In this instance, I referred to myself that way as a defensive mask.  I have opinions that are out of step and untoward in many respects - but have often been proven to be ahead of my time.....eventually.  Nice to meet  you firemonkey, whether you are a boomer of otherwise.

  • Thank you. I'm actually feeling brighter than I have done in years so I may start to post more. Who knows, I might even be back home again in the next five years? Even though I don't post much I find this community helpful, reading all your posts and advice is helping my own personal situation. I was admitted to a mental health hospital age 23 and I'm still here, hoping to be well enough to be back home soon.

    Have a nice day , and thank you for helping me feel comfortable enough to post, if only for a short time.

    Black heartDarknessBlack heart

  • I'm a so called 'Boomer'. I reached pension age on the 15th of last month.  The ASD(Asperger's) diagnosis came nearly 46 years(May 2019) after 1st seeing a psychiatrist. I'd define myself as having 'chronic difficulties in certain areas' rather than 'a bit remedial'

    Physical health has taken a battering . I've always been clumsy and badly coordinated but that's worsened over the last 3-4 years. I'm still recovering from 2 falls that happened in October 2021.  The pain from which was defined as 'psychological' by both paramedics and a GP. Eventually managed to be x rayed 7 weeks later that showed I had a fractured neck of femur.  A partial hip replacement was done 2 days later.

    Fast forwarding to now- I have, in no particular order,  atrial fibrillation,premature osteoporosis, mild scoliosis(so mild I never knew till about 2 years ago),reduced mobility, low vit D, low Iron, swollen legs and feet. Having to wear compression stockings. Mental health has improved only for physical crap to step in and take it's place.

    Cognition wise I'm doing well enough but have the common, though not universal, ASD thing of adaptive functioning < IQ.

  • Does it matter that the thread is old? Bringing it back might inspire new responses from current members and get the discussion going again.

  • 'The train runs on through wilderness
    Of cities. Still the hammered miles
    Diversify behind her face.
    And all humanity of interest
    Before her angled beauty falls,
    As whorling notes are pressed
    In a bird's throat, issuing meaningless
    Through written skies; a voice
    Watering a stony place.'

    (Philip Larkin)

  • I'm not sure you are quite correct in that assessment sir/madam/ad nauseam.  

  • Most likely most of us could be described like that Smiley 

  • Maybe. Maybe my brain (like StarTrek's Vulcans) switches between logical and emotional states. But being in the emotional one isn't fun, if I'm crazy now, multiply it thousand times, like a fully fledged lunatic fresh out of asylum. Stuck out tongue

    Have you ever seen pictures of artists of old? They all look a bit disheveled, eyes shinning mad, so I reckon they felt like they looked or more, in order to create.

  • That is a gift, in my opinion.

  • Not really.  I believe a "Boomer" is someone who is out of touch, a bit remedial, not up to date, a bit of a "dad-dancer", a door handle, S P O O N S  

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