Forum phenomenon I’ve noticed

Pleasure to meet you and welcome back, I'm glad you're still here. I'll reply fully later on, I've got to head out now.

And there goes my "resonance cannon"! B O O M,   B O O M,   with you saying......

I can't explain myself to myself so I'm not sure why I've been trying to explain to

My advice, based on what you say, is simple.

Don't give up and don't stop looking for the answers that you seek until you KNOW you have found them.

Many alluring false dawns littered my path and it took many thousands of days and many, many tens of thousands of pounds to reach my indisputable reality.  The path is a costly one, but when the "man-up" or "just take a holiday" or "you'll be ok" or "you're just depressed" obfuscatory options had been tried too many times merely resulting in the same repeat cycles of mental boom and bust - I simply knew I would need to keep seeking for myself.  I do thank God that I found peace and settlement eventually.  It has been worth it, despite the deep scars and continuing legacies of pain and destruction.

Goodspeed Tamsyn.

It always leaves a disappointing feeling when someone moves on from the forum. Over time there's been a lot of regulars who suddenly left or died, and then there's members who were new but weren't answered and I guess felt like they were ignored. I think a simple "Hello" doesn't take much to quickly type, and pointing them in the direction of advice and guidance, at least that way they might find something that will help them. I don't like leaving people feeling like they're on their own. I'm someone who does feel unwanted and alone a lot of the time and it's not a nice feeling to have. I apologise if I miss anyone who hasn't been answered but I do try to reply when I can because this is such a warm and safe space everyone who needs it should be here. It's saved my life so many times, I owe you all everything. Big thanks to you all.

Thanks Number, I love your analogy and can completely identify with it. I think I am in the midst of a self confusion/torture episode, I can't explain myself to myself so I'm not sure why I've been trying to explain to my doctor or my new therapist, I probably just need to do what I've always had to do before, pick myself up and drag myself out of the chasm.

I've only been here a couple of days but I already feel like I've found a place I belong with like minded folks

Hello Darkness.  I certainly know your namesake !  Please do jump into the threads if you feel you have something to say and feel able to do so.  I find this place a two-way street....you jump in to try and help and support someone, and you unexpectedly get a tap of the shoulder of love and support from the shadows.

Good to make your acquaintance - I hope to bump into you again soon.

I found that very moving to read - Thank YOU

Morning Tamsyn,

Well, I can tell you that I do know what rock bottom feels like.......followed by the horror of then noticing that you are only on a rock ledge that is now collapsing.....followed by realising that other rocks seem to being thrown at you from above whilst you fall......followed by realising that you are naked and being watched by everyone and they are all laughing at you.......followed by catching a break, a hand hold - all is not lost?....followed by realising your hand is actually in an angry Hippo's mouth.......etc ad infinitum.

The autistic mind, I believe, is so fantastic and apocalyptic [I'm using the latter in the truest sense of the word that some people don't realise - ie revelation of knowledge] that a sane autistic person is likely to petrify and confuse themselves often and profoundly.  I know that I do.  I also know that I cause others to be petrified of me too - often - because I am profoundly inexplicable in many, many regards.  I also know that people tend to belittle and sideline things and people they don't understand.

Loneliness is what I think we all know best.  That doesn't need to be a bad thing - it depends how you chose to define and work with your loneliness.

I have no magic bullet, but I know that I found it so PROFOUNDLY LIGHTENING on my soul when I found this place and saw resonances with my own (relatively long and tortured life) with people who obviously "knew" me and understood my reality significantly more than any other community ever has, despite having wholly different opinions, perspectives and beliefs.

This is the place for misfits and weirdos like me.  Perhaps for you too.

I hope you feel welcome and emboldened to stick around and join in......and thank you for your kind words aimed in my direction.  Bless you. x

I'm really glad you decided to come back Number. I'm new to this forum but I found myself here because I've reached rock bottom and I just need to know there are others out there who understand, who are like me and even if they cannot offer advice can be there to hear your voice when the rest of the world cannot. I'm really feeling the need for connection and I hope that I have found a kind and safe place here to do that.

I'm sad to hear that other valued members have chosen to leave, I hope you decide to stay and I look forward to getting to know you

this was my thought too, I don't do a lot online so I'm completely clueless about forum and social media etiquette 

Your definition is the same as mine 'baby boomer', although that's my parents generation.

I'm shocked the medical bods said your pain was psychological! I'm glad you got it sorted tho but sorry to hear your having so many challenges with your health

Hello Paige - nice to make your acquaintance.  I agree that everyone goes at some point....I very nearly did, last week.

Intolerance is a trigger for me.  Unfairness is a trigger for me.  Unfortunately, we recently lost a few of our "elder statesmen and stateswomen and states-whatshowsoever." In my opinion, they were some of the most reasoned and intentionally careful souls - the type that this community REALLY needs to maintain a healthly and sustainable balance of lived experience and opinion.

I have returned, predominantly because I was watching the MODS (our long suffering and volunteering kindly souls) needing to jump into threads merely to say Hi to people who come here for help and reassurance - but who were being ignored and/or overlooked.  Lets all say thanks again to our MODS.

In my short experience of this place, and my "leap of faith" to interact with the world in this wholly unnatural and "dangerous" medium/media I have noticed that people don't particularly want to have "high-end" nor especially insightful nor indemnified advice - they merely seek connection, acceptance and reassurance about all-things-autistic.

Therefore, if you can Paige - just jump in and give your opinion and advice on matters as you see fit.  You are as valid and real as anyone in this place.  I have no clue which is my elbow and which is my.......y'know.

I have needed to work through the implications and dichotomous reality of how and why some of our most established folk felt it necessary to leave recently.

Apologies for sermonising at you.....I am still seethingly cross about this matter - especially because of my perception of resultant harm being imposed on newbies to this place.  I've decided to come back before I have properly centred myself, and despite my genuinely altruistic reasoning behind that dangerous decision, I might live to regret that.  I've opted to take the dangerous route because people in this place quite literally saved my life - I want to return the favour to the next guy, lass, or whowhatsoever etc.

No, it’s a lovely thing to see something old revived and given new life. I maybe didn’t make my point as well as I intended, and I’m feeling a bit too zonked to be articulate today. But I agree that’s it’s a positive overall. Very much so. 

That is sad especially when it's someone who didn't get a response. The way of forums I suppose, everyone goes at some point. I like the current list of regular members a lot, you're all interesting and cool people and I feel lucky to get some of your valuable time. I'm not as active as I'd like but I try to help people if I can.

I love it when this happens - as you describe - because we get to read the thoughts of people who have long since melted into the ether.  On occasion, I have been surprisingly and usefully informed.

I don't believe I'm a Boomer at all to be honest, but I suppose it depends from whom's perspective I'm looking at myself from.  In this instance, I referred to myself that way as a defensive mask.  I have opinions that are out of step and untoward in many respects - but have often been proven to be ahead of my time.....eventually.  Nice to meet  you firemonkey, whether you are a boomer of otherwise.

Thank you.

Thank you. I'm actually feeling brighter than I have done in years so I may start to post more. Who knows, I might even be back home again in the next five years? Even though I don't post much I find this community helpful, reading all your posts and advice is helping my own personal situation. I was admitted to a mental health hospital age 23 and I'm still here, hoping to be well enough to be back home soon.

Have a nice day Shardovan, and thank you for helping me feel comfortable enough to post, if only for a short time.

Darkness

I'm a so called 'Boomer'. I reached pension age on the 15th of last month.  The ASD(Asperger's) diagnosis came nearly 46 years(May 2019) after 1st seeing a psychiatrist. I'd define myself as having 'chronic difficulties in certain areas' rather than 'a bit remedial'

Physical health has taken a battering . I've always been clumsy and badly coordinated but that's worsened over the last 3-4 years. I'm still recovering from 2 falls that happened in October 2021.  The pain from which was defined as 'psychological' by both paramedics and a GP. Eventually managed to be x rayed 7 weeks later that showed I had a fractured neck of femur.  A partial hip replacement was done 2 days later.

Fast forwarding to now- I have, in no particular order,  atrial fibrillation,premature osteoporosis, mild scoliosis(so mild I never knew till about 2 years ago),reduced mobility, low vit D, low Iron, swollen legs and feet. Having to wear compression stockings. Mental health has improved only for physical crap to step in and take it's place.

Cognition wise I'm doing well enough but have the common, though not universal, ASD thing of adaptive functioning < IQ.

Does it matter that the thread is old? Bringing it back might inspire new responses from current members and get the discussion going again.

'The train runs on through wilderness
Of cities. Still the hammered miles
Diversify behind her face.
And all humanity of interest
Before her angled beauty falls,
As whorling notes are pressed
In a bird's throat, issuing meaningless
Through written skies; a voice
Watering a stony place.'

(Philip Larkin)