Published on 12, July, 2020
I just revisited Jodie Smitten's excellent site and found this cluster of articles and info on school attendance - often an issue for parents and certainly an issue within my own family over at least 2 generations. Drilling down into the reasons can be quite emotional too. I was thinking at first that it might be more suitable for the Parents and Carers section but then, and especially after the school reports thread, I reconsidered. Reading through some of this, like thinking about my old school reports, set off quite a bit of reflection on my own schooling, much of which damaged or distorted me and influenced my behaviours for some considerable time. It's all still very much with me, in fact, like a voice in my head. I was always able to attend school myself, but I'm thinking now that the cost might have been too great. It also led to an awful lot of masking, some fairly negative behaviours and consequences for me, plus an almost neverending drive towards perfectionism and getting 10/10, no matter what I had to do to achieve it. :( And yes, although it can be a large "turning circle", I'm on to it now, with more insight, I think. :) If you feel OK to share here, how do you all feel about all of this? www.jodiesmitten.co.uk/school-attendance
Jenny Butterfly said:So sorry you went through all of this. And yes, I can relate to so much that you're written. I think that certain assumptions about me and my background were made based on my academic performance - apparently I couldn't be so "clever" and still be entitled to free school meals, live in a slum and be going through some quite significant family issues all at the same time.
Thank you Jenny, and the sympathy/empathy is reciprocal
Talking here to parents (and young people): having read this thread and how difficult it was for those growing up in the 60s and 70s+ :
is it much better now do you think for autistic children?
One would hope that there have been vast improvements over the decades since the '80s.
The recognition is 1st (which we wouldn't have had) but then of course the support structure is required - is that effective?
I definitely think it's better now, plus the increased awareness and training (although still not what I'd consider adequate) is feeding into that. Having the recognition plus the language to describe and relate autistic experience and needs is a major improvement, I think, although of course funds to implement any support or accommodations remain very limited.
Unfortunately I think it's all just a beginning and if the improvements have been "vast" then this says more about how dire it was back then than how good it is now. It's going in the right direction though.
And although I think it's now better for autistic children, there are still huge difficulties, with parents having to fight for the right support.
Sadly, within families like mine, none of this makes any difference when identification comes later in life, with many services just petering out after age 25. It needs to be lifelong, given the way our society and culture is set up to the detriment of minorities like ours.