Published on 12, July, 2020
Today, after a few wobbly days at work, I have asked for a meeting with my management team to discuss the reasonable adjustments that can be made to better accommodate my needs in the workplace.
For the past 11 years in my role, I have put my needs second and, at times, I have genuinely struggled to get through it.
This was a huge step for me, but being part of this community has helped me to see the importance of advocating for myself.
2 years ago, when I received my diagnosis, I was quick to brush aside the idea of adjustments. After all, I’d survived up until that point. But I’ve since learned that that approach simply wasn’t good enough, especially considering the amount of meltdowns I was experiencing at the end of a day.
I got quite upset and tearful in the discussion when asking for the meeting, as I think it was in recognition of the 11 years of work up to this point where I have just been coping rather than thriving. But I did it. It took a lot of courage for me, as historically I’ve not been good at asking for help. But I managed it.
The date is pencilled in, and now I get to have a good think in preparation for this meeting. My aim is to now think of my context, the adjustments that can reasonably be in this role and what I’m actually asking for.
I don’t really know why I’m posting this, but it feels good to write it down. I’m sure many of you can relate to that feeling here.
Coffee Guy,
Whatever happens, that is awesome and you must be incredibly proud of yourself for taking action. It's also great that you are really thinking about what could help you. I also think it's amazing that you are able to work because I am not. I mask and get to the point where I can't anymore and get really ill withdrawing and being unable to do very much at all.
My last job, before I knew I had Autism (It's been diagnosed at Sensory Processing Disorder but I see it as Autism), I became very ill from all the sensory stuff and lack of support and having to mask constantly. I wrote a letter to the company asking for reasonable adjustments. They told me that they could only do it for a period of time until I was better. I realised that I wouldn't be able to go back unless the changes were permanent. The company could not uphold that so I resigned. This is the employment circle I have been through my whole life as I didn't know I was Autistic. All my senses are heightened so it's very clear to me now why working in those environments would make me shutdown.
The point of telling you that is to say, I rather think you are in a great position to be much happier in your job as it is now because you have been there a long time and have the relationships built up already. I feel that any adjustments will make a difference to you because at the moment there are none.
I know I don't know you but I feel proud of you for doing that as it's scary.
Please let us know how the meeting goes and how it impacts on your working life. :-)
Thank you for this very kind message. I will aim to update you all in the run up/after. Who knows what will happen, but I’m hopeful that it will go well. I think the more I prepare, the better a position I will be in.