Published on 12, July, 2020
Sorry to ask but the more I read all of you, the more I wonder. I take part in this forum because I am the mum of an autistic boy who has sever language delay, stimming, meltdowns, shuttdowns etc.. however I am an astrophysicist and in my career I have worked with many people with small quirks and we were all working together in this very open minded rational atmosphere without anyone refering to an autistic label. Sure my office mate was always making the same joke and switching the lights in the same order and unplugging his things I'd be there or not but I never made a fuss about it.. I just reminded him I was still there and he would very kindly switch on the light again for me. Just to say, has society become so normative that no more quirks are allowed because all sensitive rational people (most scientists are by nature) have, as far as I have seen (nearly 50 years old, lived in 5 countries and met loads of scientists, engineers and the like. Is society excluding this way of thinking more and more? Or is there more that I do not get? What is the border between autism and hypersensitive rational (which tend to go hand in hand)?
Annie,
I can't quite grasp what you are trying to ask - or intimate - in your contribution above.
I am, however, pretty damn certain that no one here wishes to try and define borders between various outward manifestations of autism. This is simply a friendly and supportive community where like-minded folk can converse and share their thoughts and experiences.
Many of us are not blessed with a "very open minded rational atmosphere" in our daily lives - or even if we do - we don't have people who understand our brains nor share the various challenges and struggles that we encounter during our days. We might have outwardly "small quirks" only, but have you ever considered what is going on beneath our exteriors within our weird and wonderful brains? Are you aware of the suicide rate known to exist for autistic folk - both great and small?
From what I can see, people here are generally just talking. That's a good thing. I hope that is OK with you.
Thanks for raising your words.
I am deeply concerned about the suicide rate and that's why I am asking whether the problem does not lie on the other side, ie society. My son was picked up due to language delay mainly but when kids were not forced to school he wouldn't have been noticed. Many scientits in history had non classical chidhood deveopments. My question was really an open one. What pushes society to label autistic people?
You must understand that anything that smacks of either, "You don't look autistic", or, " My seven year old nephew is autistic, and you are nothing like him", raises the hackles of most autistic adults and your post was close to both. Hence the reaction.
I actively sought diagnosis after I realised that I was autistic. Rather than a label imposed from outside, many autistic adults seek an autistic identity. This is because it validates their traits and experiences. Rather than being individually, and inexplicably, 'strange' and 'peculiar' they are part of a community of similar people. They are not 'failed neurotypicals', but autistics in a society that does not allow them to flourish.
I do not see the increased suicide rates of autistic people being he result of being labelled, or self-identifying as, autistic, but the result of society being a hostile environment for them.
Thank you Martin! I get it! My headphones to cope with the city and small retreats after overloads have nothing to do with the intensity you feel. That must be exhausting.
For most of my life I thought that other people had similar problems to me, but they were much better at coping with them. It came as a surprise that the problems I faced on a day-to-day basis just did not exist at all for most other people. I realised that I was the tough one. I was coping with much more than they ever had to.
Martin said:I do not see the increased suicide rates of autistic people being he result of being labelled, or self-identifying as, autistic, but the result of society being a hostile environment for them.
To be honest Martin, I could cope with the hostile environment - I had established reasonable "work-arounds" - it was hard bloody work, but I had coped for 50 years. My problem was simply not understanding WHY society was such a hostile and alien place for me. Naturally I thought it was just me - perhaps mad, perhaps sad or perhaps bad.......but actually, I'm just different in a definable and identifiable way. Things now make so much more sense. THANK GOD (and science - obviously!)