Terrified of going back to college

Hi everyone,

just wondering if anyone is going through this too? My son is due to return to college very soon after several months out due to mental health problems. He has Selective Mutism and ocd as well as being autistic. If I’m honest I don’t think he’s going to actually be able to bring himself to go back - he’s so incredibly scared and also without hope that it will be any better than last time (and last time he found it so difficult).

im torn between feeling I should encourage him to go back - because he did enjoy some aspects of it - and feeling it’s wrong to put him back into a situation that he found so stressful. Stressful as a word doesn’t even convey it - he found it so hard and felt so lonely. He really wants to make friends but his social anxiety is so extreme that he can’t talk to anyone at all - even being near people is stressful for him. He feels so lonely and isolated in college. 
However I feel how will he ever overcome these fears and difficulties if he just spends all his time at home with his parents? 
He’s the most wonderful person - intelligent, funny, kind, caring, empathic - he has so much going for him but other people just don’t see it because around other people he just freezes and can’t be himself - his social anxiety stops him from being able to show people the person he really is. 

I feel college presents opportunities for him - but his fear is such that I don’t know if he’ll ever be able to benefit from what it offers - and that instead it will just increase his stress levels and make him feel like a complete failure (that’s what happened last time). He’s lost hope, and lost faith in himself to ever overcome his difficulties. 
He has a therapist (weekly phone call) but although she’s lovely and he gets some benefit - it’s not enough to make a significant difference to his most serious issues. Last time he was at college they couldn’t offer him specialist support for Selective Mutism - they just said they can’t provide it. He has an EHCP but that doesn’t seem to mean they have to provide specialist support. They outright said they can’t provide it. 

what should I do? I’ve made it clear to my son that’s it’s his choice whether or not he goes back. But I don’t even know myself whether or not it’s in his best interests to go back. Also if he leaves education he loses his EHCP I think? I’m wondering if he could do some online learning - would that enable him to keep his EHCP?

has anyone else on here been in a similar position? And advice or shared experience would be really appreciated! 

thanks