Published on 12, July, 2020
I react quite badly to any form of change, shock or surprise.An email about a direct debit rise for example can send me into a tailspin. Even something tiny, such as an assistant unexpectedly removing and keeping a coat hanger from an item of clothing at the checkout can cause stress and anxiety
I had other examples in mind, but am still reacting to something that happened recently so I can't think properly right now.
It's not that I can't be impulsive, because I can. But anything that blindsides me can send me into a small or a major meltdown
My ways of coping are to sleep, or if that isn't possible, play a game on my phone or watch a favourite TV show wearing my comfy clothes. But I'm looking for ways of managing my reactions to changes, rather than just coping after I've had the reaction.
Its a case of managing thoughts (and feelings), only way - don't react so extremely, and don't dwell on something and let things spiral. Tell yourself 'I'm not thinking about that' and do something else, or think about something better. Start thinking 'i can cope with these things' - and also 'i'm not going to think about that now' and do something else, so you don't dwell. A calm mindset helps, it helps you focus on dealing with solutions rather than worries.
That's great advice that will definitely work for some. But I can seldom manage it. That short-cut sounds like bliss, but I nearly always take the long way round to the same place - letting go, at least momentarily, in my case out of mental and emotional exhaustion resulting from all the forensics. I've tried mindfulness, I've tried CBT - but I've come to accept that both work most effectively on a NT mind/brain. It' still worth trying these things, to take the edge off, but that's basically the best that can be hoped for most often. Peace is much harder won for the neurodiverse I think, sustaining it even rarer.