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Panic attack

Soopy05

Hi

I am a 51 Yr old female awaiting diagnosis. My work have been very supportive and have referred me through occ health. What led me to speaking out was the pain of panic attacks and what I perceive as an inability to overcome them. I am successful in many areas in my life and professionally however there are a few situations which absolutely floor me and for the life of me I cannot get to grips with them. This has been the case since I was a child so has plagued me for over 4 decades now. I try and rationalise it and tell myself it’s confidence or self esteem, I’m just wondering if others can relate to this ? Sadly I often berate myself and feel foolish hence getting a diagnosis will hopefully help me make sense of this. 
I would stress there are numerous other factors besides this which have led me to seek support and diagnosis. Thank you in anticipation 

  • in reply to Akermanihao

    Hi everyone 

    I have suffered from panic attacks since early 20’s. I’m now 49 years old. It’s awful and for me I feel like my throat is being squeezed which results in me heaving but very rarely ever sick. I’ve found chewing gum helps randomly (don’t know why) I actually had one this morning and couldn’t say why tbh. I felt it coming on and as I work for myself and alone was able to go home before work, sit down and have a coffee and just slow things down a bit. My wife knew that I used to have them a long time ago but I have never mentioned them for a very long time now. I am currently learning to breath effectively using a book called mindful breathing by Yolanda Barker as I’ve heard this can help.

  • I can totally relate to what you're going through. I've also struggled with panic attacks and even early schizophrenia symptoms which can be tough. Sometimes, understanding the root causes can make a world of difference. You're not alone on this journey, and seeking help is a big step towards feeling better. Take care!

  • Hi, autism can be like that, you can have the odd glitch/gap in your functioning where it goes wrong or not how you wish.  I have problems still with talking and have to prepare, but if it doesn't go to plan I can get stuck as if unable to think my way forward, usually the other person has to step in as its awkward.  Probably similar with your panic attacks, you might want to look back and see what the triggers are and any thoughts before - did you think yourself into a panic, or is it automatic.  The better we know our difficulties the more chance we have to work on them, if that's possible, or try and accept them and minimise it happen.

    When you have autism and keep making mistakes or have anxiety/panic issues through life it can get to you, you can attack yourself and that then lowers confidence and raises anxiety/depression.  A diagnosis will help you see yourself better, differently, but you can start now to be kind to yourself about any difficulties/difference you have.

  • I was only diagnosed today, but I can tell you that what led me to find a diagnosis was my own behaviour, which I knew was destructive to my (work) relationships, but that I struggled to avoid, even when I felt foolish and criticised myself deeply.  I don’t have panic attacks, but I get a strong sense of physical and mental pain when I manage to get into situations of conflict and it is not easy to break out of that.  I hope that helps, but diagnosis is certainly a good way to understand your own challenges and either accept them (making life a little easier) or find ways to manage them better.

  • in reply to Catlover

    Thank you, you know I have never considered my response to be a meltdown ? All the self assessment tests I’ve completed suggest I’m on the spectrum but I’m waiting to be seen. I’ve dipped in & out of therapy for decades to no avail. 

  • I hope you don’t mind me asking if they are actually panic attacks, and not meltdowns? I guess it’s hard to know until you scrutinise your life and self…. But yes, I can relate to beating myself up over all manner of things. I just didn’t understand why I was unable to deal with certain things, and why my life was so hard. Its always an uphill struggle. I thought I was the problem for years. I could not get my head around the fact that I was intelligent yet felt stupid. Simple things were challenging for me. I felt useless to my family. 
    I realised I was autistic in 2019, and had a burnout through trying to keep it at the back of my mind for the best part of a year. Had CBT twice in 2020, evaluated myself, and self diagnosed for about 5 months prior to setting up an assessment late 2021. I got my diagnosis in March this year. I’m 49. It has been helpful. I’m still coming to terms with it, even though I knew I was autistic, but I am already more ‘the real me’ than I was before I even knew I had ASD.