Published on 12, July, 2020
To me there still seems to be a gap in the market, with most resources focussing on autistic children and young adults and hardly anything for older people. So it makes a change to see a video on the experience of older autistic people. We could really due with resources that cover the whole lifespan, I think, including end of life care (my unidentified autistic dad died on a busy, noisy ward (radio 2 blaring constantly, as if this would automatically be helpful to patients) which, even though I wasn't aware of our neurodivergence even just a few years ago, I know would have made him much less comfortable).Dad enjoyed peace and quiet, or maybe a little Radio 4 and I remember thinking that it was a pity he wouldn't wear earphones (great difficulty putting up with anything around his head or face, including glasses). We all need and deserve much better as we grow older. www.youtube.com/watch
I'd like to see some analysis of the cohorts used in these studies. I've seen the figure of 54 bandied about too. It's good in a way, as it draws attention to the difficulties we face and obviously charities will use it for that reason. However, it can also be very anxiety provoking. If I took it seriously (I really don't), I guess I'd be led to believe that I'm living on borrowed time!
I believe my father had autism undiagnosed and he lived into his 80's. Hope that gives people hope.
Yes, my dad lived to nearly 90. And he had siblings who lived even longer. All undoubtedly neurodivergent, probably multiply. There is hope, but it's not shown in these studies and people only remember the stark figures they generate.
Yes, it's very likely you do share some traits and presumably your dad can see this too? It's also likely that some of those helped him in his career but it sounds as though he enjoyed so much success in conventional terms (like the other two you mention above) that it would feel demoralising for most of us to use them as a benchmark against which to rate ourselves.
I'd probably go by the quality of person someone becomes because so much external success can be down to luck or random chance as much as innate abilities. Who's the person behind the "Who's who" entry and how would you compare people just as actual human beings, trying to get by in the world. Some people get plaudits and titles, others are never so high profile - still worthy human beings but the meaning we give to the differences can be punishing.
I'm not saying I don't still get drawn by such comparisons, but as I get older these external measures feel less and less significant. They never were that significant anyway, but I think I got inculcated at school into a hyper-competitive way of looking at life, sadly to the detriment of life itself.
Picture me at 40, still trying to get 10/10 in a wholly unsuitable role, failing badly, but redoubling my efforts in order to climb the greasy pole. Not a part of my life that I consider well lived! I can certainly compare notes about my employment experiences on these forums, but most of it is actually a very sorry tale.
My dad has just turned 92. My s/daughter has said he and I share quite a few traits. However he had a reasonably successful career working for the Foreign office. Successful enough to get a 'Who's who' entry.