PTSD?

Ah yeah, my therapist mentioned that it was her past experience of autists that probably caused her to miss mine, as well as the fact that my childhood experiences would have been enough alone to make me an extreme avoidant attachment person.

And that's an interesting point about only doing empathy if you've had a similar experience. It resonates. And I forget, I probably do sympathy but call it empathy, and prob rely on past experiences to do that too. It's trickyy to unpick cos I don't know what normal is supposed to actually be like.

No this is quite common with individuals who appear to relatively functioning by which i mean are verbal and have developed behaviours not skills like Masking, Camouflaging and False Assimilating as a defense mechanism .Your councillor may have a bias on what she believes is autism spectrum disorder is because of her relative and the facts are that autism spectrum disorder does not manifest in the same way in everyone and individuals with autism and co occurring disorder such as ADHD are going to manifest autism related traits in non typical ways because of the co occurring disorder.

Having Autism can make you predisposed to developing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder along with other mental health conditions like depression and anxiety and it's very unusual for someone to have sensory processing disorder on it own without having either ADHD or autism. 

Many people on the autism experience empathy and have the ability to empathise we are not psychopaths. what makes you autistic is how your brain processes and interprets others people expressions of verbal and nonverbal communication.

Non autistic have a pre programmed "theory of mind"  that instinctively allow them to pick up and process indirect language such as body language. because most non autistic have the same very similar thought processes this allow them to interpret that information in a similar way and act on them. In autistic individuals the "theory of mind" exists but doesn't operate in similar way to those who are not autistic. It is very uncommon for autistic individuals to have similar  thought process that allow them to have same understanding in which i mean two individuals understanding of the "theory of mind" can be very different.

individuals with autism can develop the skill to empathise but it usually only occurs because the individuals on the autism spectrum has experienced something similar first hand or have been through the exact same situation. 

Yes the professional who diagnosed me had a really rough time diagnosing me through multiple sessions and had discuss my case with multiple professionals who eventually agreed that i had autism but need to be assessed for ADHD as these two disorder where more than likely the cause of my behaviour as a child and the partially the cause of me Developing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder as a child because of my parents denial of me having something like ADHD and autism and being unfairly and cruelly disciplined for behaviours i could not control. It doesn't help that my mother and step dad listen to other people's parents and performed home style cure for autism on me.       

It does help, thanks David - I like the city analogy and it probably would benefit me to not cling onto these diagnoses so tightly. Reading through other people’s perspectives on this has been helpful 

Thanks, Ethan, you make some really good points, and my counsellor has said similar things to me, like it’s ok to have feelings. I’m currently working through a ptsd workbook with some guidance from her, it’s been slow progress (I keep procrastinating and zoning out a lot) but overall, I have started feeling better than I was before I started my sessions with her. 

Hi NAS71595, I feel the for confusion and sorry your feeling that way. The fact your asking about it shows strength on your part.  Whilst it is good to have an advocate in family I think what matters most, is what you think about yourself. It is easy for advocates and peers to get also get confused when identifying symptoms from more than one label/condition/diagnosis. Despite our perceived level of understanding as others may think of us, no one knows us better than our self.  

It's not uncommon for many individuals to have multiple labels that intersect each other such as PTSD & ASD.  The list is actually extensive.  

Mark makes some really great points.  That was a good read.  My first post here was on the topic of multiple complex diagnoses.  Many people have more than one condition.  People in general are complex beings and rarely can be boxed into one label.  This is why the system continues to reassess as children get older and or time and events pass for those much older.  Whilst some conditions are deemed permanent nothing stays the same.  Think of the labels such as ASD - PTSD - GAD - and so on as no more than the names of suburbs within a big city called 'Health & Wellbeing'  Let's break it down more by attributing all the streets within each suburb with symptoms so that we end up with Nervousness St, Agitation St, Hyper St, Sensitive St, Sad St, Angry St, Confusion St.  We can put in parks that are also referred to as disorders such as the well known Depression Park.  The longer you stay at it the more likely council will be to come along with another sign called 'Clinical'  Let's not forget an even more famous Park called Anxiety.

It's easy to get lost in the City regardless of what part of it we identify with.  In fact the identification process is very much the part many of us struggle with.  Felling lost and alone in all that confusion it's only natural to want stay in one area where we feel less vulnerable and things are seemingly familiar.  The trouble with that is we become bogged down with limited mindsets.  May as well set up camp at Agoraphobic Park! 

All the above is my attempt to unravel the Signpost Analogy. My experience is that in order not to get lost in the bigger picture or scheme of things is not to identify with prescribed or proposed labels like how we do with Sport teams, Flags, Cities, right down to the Clothes, Car, Bicycle or type of Phone one attribute themselves too.  You see the other side of the coin to all this is that many of these labels have become no more than accessories themselves in a sea of commodities/industry. Whilst that is another story in itself my point here is the two fold.  We now live in a society that fashions labels like clothes with an inherent need to favor one over the other.  The latter playing more to our competitive conditioning. Always competing.

Hence this is why many of us find ourselves struggling with more than one label. It's not understanding that the labels themselves are no more than guides within a bigger picture which leads people to becoming bound and subject to their labels.  I'm this! I'm That!  No you can't be...!  ... and thus the confusion reigns from there.  However, the more mindful we become of how easily we ourselves struggle with attachment issues, but more over, how that in itself leads to such a strong desire in wanting to belong with either one or the other and that being the case as much with our prescribed/proposed diagnoses just as it is with our advocates, family and peers. 

Life is complex. People are complex.  Take it from this Chronic Complex Case of whatever with a dash of yadda yadda.  The (Not MY) autism label recently attributed to me has greatly assisted me to find my way through that above City  - yet it's only one part of the landscape. 

In reference to finding a concrete answer. Whilst there can be undisputed facts, I tend to accept the reality that there are often no concrete answers.  At least I find life offers a lot more breathing space if I leave doors open.  

I hope some of the above helps.

My psychologist gave me a diagnosis of autism but said some of my experiences overlapped with my upbringing as a child (I was never taught life skills, emotional regulation and had to figure a lot out for myself. The relationship between parents was... strained. There's probably something else going on within all that - I had overwhelming anxiety all through my school years).

Sometimes I fall into the trap of wondering if I've a misdiagnosis - then I'll read an autobiographical autism account and instantly relate to it. (The latest I've read is https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1755458609000036 - a lot of which I connected with, and Temple Grandin's/Sean Barron's The Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships).

I made the decision to trust the assessment process and outcome. I'm experimenting with different strategies to see what works. I've concluded that a lot of my issue is information/sensory overload (at one point during lockdown I felt completely grounded because I had a set routine, no stressors and could plan my day as I saw fit, this reversed once I returned to work). I do regress a lot under stress, constant change or if I feel I'm being micromanaged. 

I guess that I'm accepting of the diagnosis from my psychologist and the insights from my therapist (the greatest gift she gave me is helping me to recognise that how I feel is important). Beyond that I'm trying out different strategies, some practical, some psychological to see what benefits me and recognising that my own experience is unique - and it's not like me, or anyone else, has a blueprint of me to work with. To that end, even if I could complete a barrage of questionnaires and assessments to unpick the different influences of my formative years and unique wiring, the issues I have to work  through are still the same. 

The Protective Shell is pretty full on Freudian and Kleinian analysis, which I find very esoteric, but it offers an alternative psychotherapy perspective to the more common psychiatry and psychological perspectives on autism that I've appreciated.

Excellent points.  Thanks for the read. 

Thanks very much Mark, that was very informative and helpful. The Body Keeps the Score is in my basket on Amazon, with a few other books - just waiting for pay day now lol. I’ll take a look at The Protective Shell, too. 

I think it is really hard to disentangle, and some things you'll never disentangle. Whether you can extract if autism is part of the tangle though will be helpful. I'd trust the original autism diagnosis, they don't give it out easily!

I shutdown quite easy in conversation, this is autism. When someone flirts with me I shutdown in a more extreme format. I think this is disassociation due to childhood trauma, but it could be an extreme autism shutdowm. It'd be nice to know which, but I suspect managing it is very similar for either reason.

Childhood autism is pretty traumatic, and enough reason to have PTSD as comorbid. Autism I suspect also generates serious avoidant attachment. I did therapy for 8 years trying to overcome avoidant attachment due to an emotionally abusive mother, but now suspect a lot of my behaviour is more to do with autistic behaviour, the associated avoidant attachment and other experiences. The Protective Shell in Adults and Children may be an interesting book for your therapist, or you. The Primal Wound is also a good book on being adopted that you may have come across. The Body Keeps the Score good on PTSD. My therapist didn't spot my autism for a long, long time until I told her. She said I hid it well, but trusted by diagnosis, and emphasised it was part of what was going on intersecting with everything else.

Plenty of autistic people have high empathy. I can be overwhelmed by my empathy for complete strangers. I'm not always great at getting why someone is upset, but if I can see they are I empathise. People have suggested I've systematised empathy, like found patterns in people's behaviour, and i kinda think they are probably right that i've found an autistic way to compensate for lack of standard empathy. I also have high IQ which I think helps find strategies to compensate for autism traits.

I'd go for accepting you've an intersection between autism, PTSD, and attachment issues for now and slowly find where the balance is. The biggest issue for me with traditional therapy is that I couldn't attach to my therapist (cos i rarely can to anyone), so didn't act out much, project, or do transference, all of which the therapeutic relationship relies on esp to over ome attachment problems. I still benefited, just not as much as others would. What I'd have probably also benefitted from is Psycho Ed from an autism specialist.

It’s being told one thing then another, just getting confused and want a concrete answer. I’ll do what you suggest, however, then just go with what they say. Thanks!

not sure what the issue is here. Its not usual to have autism and PTSD. But you need to go to a psychiatrist to get a diagnosis of PTSD ( there are different types )  along with your autism.