Autism and sexual desires

Hi all,

I’m autistic, 17, and over the last few months, I’ve become slightly concerned about the things I do when I’m aroused. For example: when I become aroused and see a good looking guy’s profile (I’m bisexual), I may message them and deliberately try to get them to talk about sex/masturbation in a sly way as it turns me on to know that a good looking person is sexually active etc, despite how uncomfortable they sometimes may feel. I always regret it afterwards and feel guilty for behaving in such a strange way - because in real life, outside of the online world, I’m an extremely nice, funny, and a good person to be around. 

it’s all just been bothering me quite a lot recently when I’ve had the chance to really think about my sexual behaviour, and I sometimes feel guilty when talking to my friends as I think “wait, I’m weird and they’re not; why do these people want to speak to me?”. I feel like I’m hiding something from them, and then I start questioning whether my typical personality is just a front and if the aroused side of me is who I really am, which I then decide is untrue. I’d call the behaviours I’ve listed very odd if I heard someone else acting in this way, as it’s almost like I’m drunk when sexually aroused online and do such out of character things. I’d like to know your thoughts on this...