Published on 12, July, 2020
Not much is available where I live that suits me. I keep checking to see if a small or at least cheap-ish bungalow or house come up because I don't know if I can face living in a flat anymore. The noise from neighbours above or below me feels just that little bit too much to take. It drives me up the walls.
There's still noise with many houses and bungalows but because it's to the sides I feel that's easier. In both the flats I've lived in I've had situations where when I've moved about the neighbour makes more noise moving around and opening and closing things, or doing stuff that makes noise, as well. In the previous flat I owned and the current one I felt and do feel claustrophobic, that my every move is being reacted to or noticed.
It's wanting to get away from that that is on my mind so much. Maybe I should try to move into a house or bungalow that seems out of my budget. Eek I hate not being very wealthy. I worry about things so much. Maybe I don't need as much money as I think, perhaps it would be worth having less money if I lived somewhere where I felt at peace. I might get more done, more reading, studying, pursuing my hobbies, feel less stressed, more able to relax and enjoy things.
Decisions, decisions!
I totally get this post.
I can't cope with the noise I make, yet alone the neighbours.
I wear earplugs around the house, and have fans on upstairs and downstairs, all day.
I also 'put the rain' on....on my tablet or phone, ASMR.
Plus, I will go out in my car and have various places which are hidden and not overlooked. Just for the privacy. So hard to find that small space these days....
Finally, I am saving for a small van, so that I can finally have that small space detatched from people.
Van life. A home that is just for post.
I hope there is something here that may help you, all the best x
In effort to help your current situation do you have a space to yourself right now? A flat, or a room at least?
I'm a maker, if I can identify a problem then I can, nearly always, make a solution.
If you have, even a small space, then you can likely make a solution. In this instance, the smallest solution I can think of is a lined pod/box/nook. If it were me, I could build, or pay someone to build, a noise insulated nook to sit, lay, or read in, that was lined with sound dampening panels. Like in a recording studio.
Yes this isn't ideal, but it can work in a small space, or be expanded into a room size or bigger etc.
Sometimes the perfect option (your own house in the country) isn't available. But, what small change could you make yourself right now? Theres always something in my opinion
Good luck
I feel so isolated like no one understands, sometimes its just a lonely existence, I feel excluded but then also I cannot bear crowds and noise, I suffer from Hyperacusis, it really has a negative affect on so many things, including where I live, noise from outside, traffic, dogs barking, children playing, it never stops apart from late at night, hence I am awake....... I hope you are OK ? Sarah......I even have to wear ear plugs indoors at some stages, but I cant block out everything, its so hard :(
Me too !
I seem to have been lucky to find somewhere below market value, but the north (especially towns like mine) are much cheaper to live in in general. I used to live in Edinburgh and the rent there would now be around double of where I am now for a similar place
WOW £300 a month , any more going ,
i live in the south and i pay well lets just say universal credit would not cover it at all .
Yep thats where i will be heading soon ,
before i got my diagnosis i was taken of universal credit and told to get a job , which i did,
but then got diagnosed and a year later i am back at the same place looking like i have lost my job so will be going back onto u/c and cueing at the food bank again ,
but at least i know how that all works and its not to daunting and the people are nice
I wish that I could live in a woods somewhere. I wouldnt care for electricity. I'd have a fire, grow my own food. But I would like water to drink
I think a lot of people were busy running around and readjusting to the changes in lockdown from 1 June. See how popular your post has become after a little while.
I get very anxious after starting a thread, if no-one joins in, but give it some time. I also noticed the notifications werent working a few days ago.
Sometimes the thread goes in different directions too, but we are just humans bumbling around too.
My life improved immeasurably after moving from a flat. I didnt post it because a) it sounds like gloating, although I did it in my 40's, and B) I don't want to encourage possible financial strain on someone else. I would rather live in a place 10 foot wide with neighbours at the sides than have upstairs and downstairs neighbours.
Something about the sounds from a neighbour upstairs penetrates all forms of earplug, because it's more a vibration you can feel than a sound you hear.
Hi Roswell - I reply to most anything but, from my own point of view, I find it difficult to think of an appropriate replay to a lot of your posts - or you often might ask for things that I can't provide - so I have no useful input for you.
I'm not ignoring you and I have no ill-will towards you.
I too want to disappear to somewhere quiet. I'm near London so it's always chaos around here. I plan to get this house sorted and then we can up-sticks to the countryside. I'd like a couple of acres so I can do my own thing without having to think about annoying anyone or having anyone annoy me.
I am lucky enough to live in a nice quiet place, the first floor in a block of flats.
Unfortunately it costs too much, I'm on universal credit and the LHA ( local housing allowance) does not cover my rent and I am being repeatedly told to find something cheaper.
I empathise. We can’t afford to buy so have to rent a dilapidated flat. Our neighbour is a conspiracy theorist who regularly screams at his child and swears constantly. I’m trying to work from home through this and I find it deeply upsetting and frustrating. I would love a place to call home but unless we move 300 miles...and I would have to try and find new employment, there’s little hope of change.
I want a place like Jungle with Electricity, Water, and Basic Groceries.
[Link removed by moderator] to roam around and Bamboo house...
That's really wonder-full.
Hi I know that viewing flat/houses is stressful and even more so for us but I would recommend viewing a few different places. I live in Blackpool which probably has one of the worst reputations in the UK, but I live on a very quiet culdesac street at the back on a first floor flat. I hardly ever hear my neighbours through the wall although I do hear my loud neighbour shouting at her kids outside sometimes through the day. At night it's very quiet, almost too quiet. My rent is also very cheap for a private let at only just over £300 per month. I think I was really lucky to find this flat
Nobody is interested in the abuse I've received. Wall of silence and indifference, hey, what a surprise. Welcome to the Disunited Kingdom of peoppe who don't give a damn.
I would like to get away from all of that
maybe, one day, maybe, but not yet
one should always dream because otherwise what’s left?
I told my therapist today that whatever I post online here, anywhere, I mostly get ignored and disliked. They didn't believe me or argued against what I said (not in an aggressive way, in a debating kind of way).
Once again, I underestimated my own intelligence in conceding victory in the to-and-fro of ideas and rhetoric to her. I knew I didn't belong here. Why did I not listen to my own gut?
A tip to you all. In future, if you don't like someone just don't reply to any of their posts. That way they'll stop annoying you in a more prompt timeframe.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISDIAVarYjU
I am exactly in the same situation.
I often feel desperate.
I do not know what to do.
I feel there is no way out.