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How do neurologically typical people feel & experience life?

I'm done with Christmas Cards
over 4 years ago

I know this is pretty futile musing, although maybe some of the more neurologically typical people on here can help! (I shy away from using the term "NT's" because it feels a bit "them and us" to me).

I've found myself wondering, as I'm accepting, exploring and deepening my understanding of my own atypicalness & ASD diagnosis, about what it's like for others.

For every "aha!" moment I have about e.g. noisy restaurants, eye contact, lack of capability / impetus to maintain friendships, exhaustion in social situations, there is a corresponding "What's it like for others?" moment.

So for example, for typical people:

  • How does the world *sound*? Is it muted, filtered by attention etc?
  • How does eye contact *feel* when experienced as something that you *want* to do? Even with strangers?
  • What's it like to be drawn to want to be with a group of other people?
  • What's it like to enjoy a day out with friends, and not be exhausted (except in a tired & content kind of way)?
  • What's it like to be thrilled at the prospect of going out every single evening for days in a row?
  • What's it like to want to ask other people where they went on holiday, and be interested in what they tell you about where they went and what they saw?
  • What's it like to say the opposite of what you mean, because for e.g. you're being polite, and yet know that everyone knows what you actually mean?
  • What's it like to wish that you had more time for travel, seeing family members, more face to face meetings etc?
Parents
  • over 4 years ago
    “since dinosaurs when extinct,” and then later on in the same documentary say, “birds are dinosaurs” don’t say “since dinosaurs went extinct” earlier on then!

    I get this too. It's like our brains are tuned to spot this stuff. I get a similar annoyance about speed limit signs not adhering to the design regulations. Some councils seem to put them up randomly (big ones where they should be little ones etc & even some with the wrong numbers on!). One that I find really annoying is where a speed limit change is *moved* and they leave the old signs in place - from their design you know that they are not *reminder signs* and it causes confusion because say you're in a 40 and see 30 signs, then further along see the old set of 30 signs, you then get confused about what limit you were just in (if it's changing to 30, was I in a 40?) - obviously, the answer can be "if you're paying attention you will know" but this adds an extra cognitive burden to the driver which can only mitigate *against* safety.

Reply
  • over 4 years ago
    “since dinosaurs when extinct,” and then later on in the same documentary say, “birds are dinosaurs” don’t say “since dinosaurs went extinct” earlier on then!

    I get this too. It's like our brains are tuned to spot this stuff. I get a similar annoyance about speed limit signs not adhering to the design regulations. Some councils seem to put them up randomly (big ones where they should be little ones etc & even some with the wrong numbers on!). One that I find really annoying is where a speed limit change is *moved* and they leave the old signs in place - from their design you know that they are not *reminder signs* and it causes confusion because say you're in a 40 and see 30 signs, then further along see the old set of 30 signs, you then get confused about what limit you were just in (if it's changing to 30, was I in a 40?) - obviously, the answer can be "if you're paying attention you will know" but this adds an extra cognitive burden to the driver which can only mitigate *against* safety.

Children
  • over 4 years ago in reply to I'm done with Christmas Cards

    That sounds painful to me. I hate stuff like that, contradicting signs and stuff. It doesn't just irritate me, it also feels...odd. I can't describe the feeling but it's not pleasant and if enough contradictory stimuli is out there it can lead to meltdown or shutdown for me. 

    I don't understand how NT's shut that stuff out at all. 

    I know people that believe certain stuff that may be considered 'spiritual' or 'supernatural' and then when/if you point out flaws some of them are able to accept those flaws in their belief and admit it makes it seem 'unlikely' yet they'll also turn around and say, "But it's still my world view" And it blows my mind every time that happens. I understand cognitive dissonance is hard and people can double down on their beliefs to begin with, and I'm fully aware I'm not always right either and that I can and do fall prey to this too. But from what I observe in NT's i'm much less casual about it. I can't just turn around and say, "Well I still believe X Y and Z" even if I really, really want to believe something. Once a flaw or a potential problem with my belief has been pointed out I can't not focus on it!  

    If I ask the same 'NT' person the same question about their belief say a few weeks later, they'll have returned to their initial belief and seemingly have forgotten the flaw, or if not forgotten it have somehow managed to convince themselves the flaw doesn't matter. I just don't understand that. 

    I assume it must be a much more peaceful life inside their heads to be able to do that. (I don't' wish to say NT's have complete peaceful lifes and no troubles. Just that certain things they seem more able to let go of and probably are more at peace for those specific reasons)