Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, so I am currently considering requesting an ASD assessment from my CMHT as this is something that has been on my mind since I was 12 when I learned what Autism was. I am 20 now and I feel like I want to pursue this however I understand that someone will need to give a full developmental history and I don't know how to bring this up to my Mum. I brought up my worries when I was 14 and my Mum very much disagreed stating I was saying it for attention and wanted to copy friends. I am worried she will still believe this and that it'll effect our relationship. I am just looking for some advice on how to address the situation if anyone has similar experiences.
Thanks
Hi! Ideally you take a family member along who can give a developmental history BUT it is not essential I was diagnosed without taking a family member with me. That said, as a mum myself I don't think that it should affect your relationship with your mum by asking her to attend the assessment. Why do you think she would react adversely to this?
She reacted adversely in the past. She said I was being irrational and that I was copying others around me. I'm worried she'll turn it on me again. Even if the assessment is negative this has been burning in my head for 8 years. I now work with children with ASD and have helped mark up ADOS's as part of my course. I think I now know enough for someone to take my concerns seriously and I just hate the idea of my Mum being disappointed or ashamed.
It seems as though you’ve had many years to think through your likely ASD as well as having the work related knowledge and experience to validate your suspicions. I would like to think that your mum would acknowledge your opinions and concerns. Maybe write her a letter or an email to explain/ask, if you’re not comfortable having the conversation face to face? Or, if you really feel that telling your mum would do more harm than good then maybe go on your own.